Something sharp cuts through my chest. “Moment? What fucking moment?”
He shrugs again, comes into the living room and plops down on the couch. “Oh, it was nothing. Should have heard her beg though, Alf, that shit could send me loopy.”
I lick my teeth. “Cade’s not going to be happy with you.”
“Oh, please, he’ll thank me that that’s the only thing I did do. The chances were high of me doing anything. You should be proud of me. Unsupervised with her and a hickey is all I did? You don’t give me enough credit sometimes.” He grabs the remote and flicks on the TV.
“Congratulations, you controlled your urges like a grown man. Man of the fucking year.”
I stalk off in search of El. I find her in one of the downstairs bathrooms. Her eyes and cheeks are wet as she cranes her neck to see the damage.
I take her face into my hands again, pulling her gaze away from herself. “Listen, I’m sorry Fiz did that to you, he’s a prick.”
Another tear falls down her face. I stroke it away with my thumb. “Why can’t they be like you? If they were both like you, then I’d be fine. We’d all be fine.”
I offer her a sad smile. “I’m one of a kind, baby, I’m afraid. But at least you do have me. One out of three is better than none, right?”
Her small hands come up to hook onto my forearms between us. Her hands are cold but soft. The contact sends a concerning amount of heat through my body. Every rare occurrence whereour bare skin has collided, it’s ignited this same confusing, awakening fire within me. Each time it gets a little hotter.
I have to take a long breath to keep my cool.
“Why haven’t you tried anything?” she says, voice timid. “Are you being nice because you’re not attracted to me?”
Gees, this girl really is broken. There’s too much in those questions to unpack right now. The obvious neglect she’s experienced makes her want to romanticise the only bit of security she finds. Or having the only nice guy in her life not making advances makes her feel ugly and unwanted. Way too much to dive into.
I have to approach this carefully. She’s so fragile that one wrong word, one wrong tone, and she’ll shun me.
“Baby, listen to me,” I say, voice slow and careful, “You are one of the most attractive women I’ve ever met. You shouldn’t be questioning why I haven’t tried anything, you should ask why they have. It’s about our characters more than yours. I love my brothers, but we’re very different when it comes to women. I know you’re probably used to their treatment more than mine, so you’re finding it hard to navigate my behaviour towards you. But trust me, what I’m doing for you is more normal than what they are. Okay? I’m not going anywhere. But I’m also not going to take advantage of you.”
She sucks her lips in, pressing them into a thin line, and blows out a long breath through her nose. I study her as she avoids meeting my gaze. I look at her how I have all week. I see the beauty beneath the wounds, see the strength behind the sadness. She’s fierce, but still so soft. Delicate. From a world that has tried so hard to break her, to turn her into something dark and terrible, she refuses to yield. She still remains soft.
The restraint I’ve had out of respect to Caden withers a bit.
One teeny moment of indulgence won’t hurt, will it? I can give in for one little second. Maybe if I give myself a small taste,it’ll douse this growing inferno inside me just enough to stop me burning alive.
I lean forward and press my lips onto her forehead.
I hear her stop breathing for the couple seconds I hold my mouth to her skin. Hunger fills my veins. Images of all the other places I’d like to put my lips on her body swarm my brain.
I break away before the urges boil over.
“I’ll spend tomorrow with you, okay?” I say, letting her go so I can calm my hammering chest. “I can take you into the gym. You need some meat on those bones if you’re going to survive the hunt night.” She frowns. “The figurative sense, El. You’ll survive, but your lungs might not if you don’t build your stamina up.”
Her face softens. “Thank you, Alfie.”
I give her a tight smile. “No problem. Come on.” I slide an arm around her shoulders. “You’re eating dinner with us again tonight.”
Sharing that tender moment has done nothing to quell my desire nor curiosity for her. If anything, I’ve made it ten times fucking worse.
CHAPTER 18
CADEN
Ishouldn’t be peeping inconspicuously like a teenager finding his first porn video, but here I am. I can’t help it, any glimmer I can get of Elodie without that vulgar scowl on her face I’ll take it. It’s the only time I can glimpse a modicum of our possible future. One where I’ve moulded her into the perfect wife and she bows before me every day.
I’ve only seen it a couple of times. When she walks into the room and doesn’t spot me first. When my senses prick and eyes land on hers to see the delicate beauty behind the scowl. Then I watch as she notices me, see the first moment of surprise, the subtle diffidence, before the glower returns.
Dinner was civil last night. She seems to have taken the bait of taking The Hunt seriously, conserving all her hateful energy for it. Every time Fiz made a crude comment, she sucked in her cheeks as if physically holding back her retorts. All I could focus on was the deep groove in her pale skin. The hollow of those cheeks and the image of my cock shoved between those puckered lips pummelled me.
