She reels as if she’s been slapped.“You read my mail?”
“Kinda hard not to when you leave it sitting out in the open like that.”
“West,” she says softly.
“When did you apply?”
Daisy shakes her head, inhales, and opens her mouth, but she closes it.
“When?”I demand, a little too forcefully.
“After the funeral.”
My brows shoot into my hairline as I try to understand that.Weeks?She’s had three weeks to tell me about this, weeks of fucking, weeks of goodnight kisses, weeks of bliss, or so I thought.“When were you going to tell me ...after you left?”
“It wasn’t like that.”She crosses the room and presses her palms against my chest, beseeching me.“I didn’t even know I’d get in.”
“I can’t ...”I take a beat, because I don’t want to say something I can’t take back, and I sure as hell don’t want to hurt her.She’s had a lifetime of that from the people she loves.
“I don’t want to take this away from you,” I grab her hand and hold it to my chest, “Because, darlin’, this is so well deserved, and I know how much you’ve wanted this.Of course you’d get in.”
“Come with me?”
I smile sadly.“I can’t.Me and this ranch?We’re a package deal.I can’t leave my family to do my job for me.This is my burden to carry.”
“West ...I have to do this.”
“I know, darlin’.”I lean in and kiss her forehead, inhaling the scent of her sweet shampoo, maybe for the last time.I cup her cheeks, and Daisy covers my hand with hers.“I’m really happy for you.”I smile, even though my heart is breaking.I step back and put some distance between us.“I’m gonna get a little air.”
“Are you coming to bed?”
I shake my head and walk toward the door.“Think I’m gonna sleep on the couch tonight.It’s probably a good idea if we get used to sleeping alone again.”
“West, can we just talk this out?Me training in Dallas doesn’t have to be the end of us.”
“Yeah, it does.I can’t go with you.I can’t ever leave this fucking place,” I snap, and instantly regret it, but the damage is done.She withdraws into herself.“I’m sorry.I don’t ever wanna be the kind of man who’s okay raising my voice at you.”
“It’s only six months.”Her eyes well with tears.“It wouldn’t be forever.”
“Come on, Dais.You really think you’re gonna get to the big smoke and not fall in love with it out there?They’re gonna see how talented you are in Dallas and wanna keep you, and I can’t blame ’em.Iwanna keep you.Hell, I wanna go with you, but if I did, the whole goddamn ranch falls apart, and my family’s legacy with it.I won’t do that to them.”
Tears stream down her face, and it takes every fiber of my being not to go to her right now, but if I did, I’d only make promises I can’t keep.So I stay right by the door, and I feel like absolute fucking shit as her silent tears turn into sobs.“Don’t be sad about this, darlin’.You’re gonna land on your feet.”
I swallow back my own tears and step outside.Icy air creeps under my collar and regret churns my gut, but there’s nothing to do for it now.My family need me, my future nieces and nephews need me to keep the wolves away from the land they’ll inherit, and Daisy needs to do this for her and for Waylon.I don’t blame her for that, and I would never hold it against her.We can’t change it, no matter how much it hurts.The idea of losing them both is a cut right to the marrow, and not for the first time, I curse this damn land for the strings that bind me to it.
