‘I meant in the UK. Weren’t you spending Christmas in Albania, or Lithuania, or ...’
Josh grinned. ‘Or some other place ending in -ania?’ he teased.
Although my feet were now back on the cobblestones, Josh’s arms were still around my waist. It was a small move, but it felt likea very big one as I wriggled myself out of his hold and took a step back to stand beside Adam. It forced my old friend to swivel his eyes over to the man at my side.
‘Adam,’ I said, turning to him first, because it felt important to get the order of the introduction right. ‘This is my old friend, Josh. Josh, this is Adam ... my partner.’
It went very quiet for a moment. I felt the passing of every single second as I waited. Adam extended his hand to Josh a split second before Josh lifted his. They shook and I had no idea whose grip had been just a fraction too hard for a polite greeting, but I had no doubt someone’s had been.
‘Nice to meet you,’ Adam said, his voice giving nothing away. ‘Lily has told me all about you.’
Annoyingly, Josh allowed his eyebrows to rise at that. ‘Has she?’ he said, picking up a metaphorical stick and already deciding to poke the bear with it.
I turned and glared at him, and the stick was immediately dropped.
‘Well, I’d only believe half of the nice things she said. She was probably just being kind.’
‘And what about the bad things?’
I whirled around, and this time it was Adam’s turn to be on the receiving end of my glare.
Josh laughed and patted my shoulder in a jovial ‘we’re all mates here’ kind of way. ‘Oh, they were definitely all true.’
I didn’t know who had suggested that Josh should join us in the Oktoberfest tent for a beer. I was fairly sure it hadn’t been me. But then I equally couldn’t imagine one of my companions floating the idea either.
The tent was large and bustling. Long trestle tables were filled with people enjoying the chance to sample the extensive range of craft beers and take a load off for a few minutes. We stood at the entrance for several moments, scanning the tables for a place. Perhaps, if none could be found, we’d have to abandon this plan, I was thinking hopefully, when a foursome sitting on the end of the table nearest the exit got to their feet and Josh swooped in to claim the vacant seats.
Adam waited until I’d slid on to the bench opposite Josh before setting down the bag he was carrying. ‘What would you like?’ he asked Josh, and I held my breath, willing Josh not to give a snarky reply and just choose a damn beer. Perhaps my telepathy skills were better than I realised, because that was what he did.
Josh waited until Adam had stepped away to join the long queue at the bar before turning back to me. His smile was the one that used to melt my internal organs, but for the first time ever I could feel its potency had waned.
‘I can’t believe we’ve randomly run into each other like this,’ Josh said, shrugging out of his heavy jacket and pulling the beanie from his head. Despite my resolve, something kicked inside me as he rolled his shoulders and settled back on to the bench. Old habits die hard, screaming in protest when you deliberately decide to ignore them – or so it seemed.
‘I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you were coming back to the UK for Christmas.’ Josh wasn’t exactly the most reliable of correspondents. He rarely used his phone when travelling and had a habit of turning up unannounced at my door, something I’d always kind of loved, but now I felt unsettled and jangly.
‘It was a last-minute decision. Claire was giving me a hard time about being constantly away, so I thought I’d surprise everyone.’
I allowed my eyes to flicker towards Adam, who was still some distance from the head of the queue.
‘Consider me surprised.’
‘Ditto,’ Josh said, his own eyes also going to Adam. He went to reach for my hand across the beer-sticky tabletop, but I whipped it out of his way. Up went the eyebrows again. ‘You didn’t tell me you were seeing anyone.’
‘Was I meant to?’ My question was all innocence and nonchalance. ‘I mean, I never know who you’re seeing.’
The eyebrows drew closer together. Truly, I could have an entire conversation with Josh without him ever having to say a word. ‘That’s because the people I “see” are all impermanent and unimportant.’
‘I’m sure they’d all love to hear that,’ I said, so sweetly that he winced.
‘You know what I mean. None of them was ever going to be a long-term fixture in my life. The kind you’d want to introduce to your oldest friend as your “partner”.’
Ah, so that was what had stung.
‘Partner, not boyfriend,’ Josh said, a frisson of something like panic flickering across his face when he saw that Adam was now being served. ‘It sounds like it’s serious, Lily.’
I licked my lips nervously. This was a conversation I’d always known would come. What I hadn’t known was how I would feel about it. Surprisingly okay, as it turned out.
‘It is serious, Josh. I think he might be the one.’
