Ethel’s mouth began to move, but no words came out for the first second or two.
Finally, she said, “Mr. Quinn has... feelings for me?”
Cassian let out a long breath.
“Yes, and it’spainfullyobvious,” he said through a chuckle.
Ethel’s mouth curled into the sweetest smile for a brief instant before she must have caught herself and subsequently forced it away. Cassian had to bite the inside of his cheek a little to keep from smiling even more himself in return. He was happy for them, though he felt a little betrayed, too, mostly because he felt foolish for not having noticed their burgeoning relationship earlier.
And of course, he still hadn’t managed to figure out how to fix the mess that was his and Ethel’s engagement. He considered it for a while more.
Finally, he said, “Would you marry him?”
“I...” Ethel’s eyebrows pinched. “But we’re engaged, Cassian.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
Ethel stayed quiet for several seconds. Cassian brought his hands together, forming a steeple with his fingers as he waited for her reply.
“Yes,” she whispered after a moment more. “If I could.”
Shrugging, Cassian asked, “Why couldn’t you?”
“You know why,” she said, her voice still small.
“Because we made a promise to each other, yes?”
Ethel nodded.
Cassian needed to nudge her. He needed her to admit (to him and to herself) what heknewshe must have wanted.
“But promises can be broken,” Cassian reasoned. “Not without consequences, of course, but they can be.”
“Yes, that’s true,” she said slowly, her eyes falling to her lap. “But my mother expects me to marry a man like you. Not a... valet.”
“But you’d be happier with him.”
“I’ll be happy enough with you.”
“But you’d be happierwith him,” Cassian repeated.
Ethel fell silent again. Cassian pushed himself to stand, and she slunk lower in her chair, keeping her eyes fixed on her lap. He knelt beside her.
“Ethel, look at me,” he said, his voice a mixture of sweet and harsh that he hadn’t intended. He softened it a little. “Look at me, please.” Ethel’s eyes found his. “I know you are content with our engagement. But I know, too, that you would be happier with him.”
Her eyes filled with tears. One tumbled down her cheek.
“I never meant to hurt you,” she said before letting out a choked sob.
“You haven’t hurt me,” he said. “I care for you, Ethel, but I’m not in love with you.”
More tears fell from Ethel’s eyes. Cassian retrieved his handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to her.
“I think that we ought to end our engagement,” he said. “Right now, informally, and more formally once we reach New York. After we settle back into our routine, we can put some sort of official communication together for our families and for everyone else as well. I’m not looking to create some sort of scandal here on the ship.” He thought for a moment and then smiled wryly. “Although, perhaps I already created a bit of one when I kissed you in the middle of the lounge yesterday afternoon.”
Ethel laughed through another small sob. Her laughter faded, and she began to cry in earnest into the little white square of fabric.
“Don’t cry,” he implored. “Ethel, Mr. Quinn will still have you, if that’s what you’re concerned about. I watched the two of you talking in the hallway this morning. He seemed completely unfazed by the kiss we shared. Or, maybesharedisn’t the right word. I forced it on you.”
