The one upside to Ethan being from the Shingae is that he won’t drop like a fly by merely being in the presence of the Seonangshin. But if he turns out to be an evil bastard, then maybe it’ll be better if the god strikes him down. My hands curl into fists, even as my elongated claws dig into my palms. In my mind, flames engulf the cypress grove, and the Seonangshin burn. I realize with a chill that I would destroy anyone who tries to hurt Ethan. Even the gods.
I take a deep breath, and my claws become fingernails again, allowing the little bloody crescents on my palms to mend. I glance at Ethan. He’s so beautiful that my heart skips a beat. And he’s a good man ... no, male. Iknowthis in the marrow of my bones. Then why would he hide his identity from me? Nothing makes sense.
“Is everything all right?” I feel his eyes on me, so I continue looking straight ahead. “You seem ... quiet.”
“When have I ever been chatty?” I shrug, super chill.
“Are you nervous about going to the cypress grove?” he asks gently.
“Ha!” I pause because I actuallyamnervous about going before the ancient cypress grove, like any sane being of the Shingae. Besides, he just gave me the perfect excuse for my weird mood. “Well, yes. Iamnervous. Very.”
He reaches for my hand and links his fingers through mine. Emotions of the squishy variety invade my heart, and I don’t protest. I accept the quiet comfort he offers, because it loosens the vise tightening around my chest.
“Everything will be okay.” He gives my hand a reassuring squeeze. “The Seonangshin in Monterey was helpful, right?”
“Yes, but you can’t predict the temperament of the Seonangshin.” I manage a small smile. “Each manifestation is unique, and not all of them are kind.”
“But aren’t gods supposed to be ...good?”
“Aww, you’re sweet.” I pat his cheek.
So quick that I can’t pull away, he presses his hand over mine and turns his head to plant an open-mouthed kiss on my palm. I feel the barest flick of his tongue and gasp despite myself. He doesn’t stop me when I snatch my hand away, but his half-hooded glance makes me exhale a shaky breath.
“It’s not as black and white as that. Gods let horrors occur for thegreater good—whatever the fuck that means,” I say once I can speak in a normal voice. “Sure, their end goal might be good, but they don’t always get there by doing good things. That might make them practical but not exactlygood.”
He nods as he absently swipes his thumb over the back of my hand. I hope he can’t see my blush in the dark. Besides, the hike up the mountain is a workout. Anyone would be flushed from the exertion.
The air suddenly changes, and the moonlight turns liquid, drenching the woods around us in a silvery glow. Our hands tighten around each other’s. The Seonangshin’s power is palpable—it vibrates in my bones—and I don’t need my spirit eyes to know which way to go.
Ethan walks quietly at my side. He must feel the tidal wave of gi too.Who are you? What are you hiding? Were you and Ben hiding the truth from me all those years ago? Or were you keeping it from your brother as well?I turn my wayward thoughts to the present. I can’t be distracted in the presence of the Seonangshin. Such disrespect will not go unpunished.
The deeper we hike into the woods, the denser the trees grow. They block out the light of the moon and turn our path pitch black. Ethan closes the distance between us until our shoulders brush with every step. We weave in and out of the trees with halting gaits, like we’re finding our way through a maze blindfolded. But the hum of magic inside me reaches a fevered pitch. We’re close.
All of a sudden, we’re standing in an open field, the trees forming an enormous circle around us. And at the opposite end, a grove of twelve sprawling cypress trees stands apart from the rest. I fall to my knees and lay my forehead on the ground. I feel Ethan kneel beside me and can only hope that he’s paying obeisance to the Seonangshin as I am.
Keeping my head bowed, I open my backpack and grab all the remaining mini bottles. One by one, I pour the liquor onto the ground with two hands. Once the last bottle is emptied, I feel a bony hand grip my elbow. I gasp but don’t jerk my arm away. At the prompting of the hand, I rise to my feet before I lift my gaze from the ground.
“Halmeoni,” I choke out as tears fall down my cheek. She’s here. She wasn’t avoiding me after all.
Samshin Halmeom pulls me into her arms and smooths her hand down my hair. “Hello, little fox.”
I wail and spill a hundred years’ worth of tears. She holds me through it all. Samshin Halmeom is the Seonangshin. I should be terrified of her, but all I feel is joy and relief at seeing her after all this time. It’s almost like seeing my mother again.
“Halmeoni—” I straighten when she drops her arms after one last pat on my back. “I mean, Samshin Halmeom. My mother ... she’s ... gone.”
“Yes, I know,” she says, her hands held behind her stooped back.
“And I ... I ...” I swallow back a sob.I took so many lives.
“I know it all, child.” Her expression is unreadable, but she sounds weary. Then her gaze shifts, and she barks out a dry, cackling laugh. “Tell that boy to stand up.”
Ethan is looking up at us with wide eyes, but he’s still on his knees. Although she spoke in Korean, he gets the gist and stands up. He bows from the waist and says, “Samshin Halmeom.”
She peers at him for a long while with a tinge of sadness in her mischievous smile. Then she turns to me and says, “You got yourself a looker.”
“I didn’t ... He’s not my ...” I glance down and press my lips together. There’s no use lying to the Seonangshin. I don’t think he’s my anything. I’m not even sure if I want him to be. But regardless of what I want, I might be falling for him without having any idea who he really is or what he’s playing at ... My head jerks up. Samshin Halmeom has to know. “Do you—”
She cuts me off with a stern gaze. “Why don’t you focus on why you came here, little fox?”
