I jump to my feet and walk in the opposite direction from the film.
“Torren? You okay?”
I can hear Felix approaching, and I wave him off as I walk down the hill. “Just need air.”
Which is a stupid thing to say, because we’re outside, but I need to walk, move. My feet carry me to the bottom of the hill, and I look at the cars racing down the street that borders the drive-in. Flashes of the Kays’ car arriving at the group home cloud my vision. I shake my head, trying to get rid of the image and all of the feelings that swirled within when I saw it.
That mix of hope and anxiety was soon followed by horror. My God, I was so little. I didn’t know what to do when it all started, and I just… followed orders.
The fury builds inside me, angry for that little boy who just wanted a family, but instead got a couple of monsters. How can people believe in God when shit like that happens? Why would God make people like that? Why would they hurt children?
Why did it have to happen to me?
I open my mouth to release a soundless scream and fall to my knees, slapping my head to stop the thoughts.
“Torren! What is it? What’s wrong?”
Fuck!I didn’t want him to see this.
He wraps his arms around me, “Talk to me. What do you need? I’m here.”
The dam finally breaks, the tears spilling down my cheeks. I do everything I can to muffle my sobs, but they rip from my throat. Felix pulls me closer and lets me rest my head on him.
That’s when I finally let it out. I scream. With my face pressed into his sweater, I release one, sustained scream for all of the years of pain I had to endure.
And Felix holds me.
Chapter 30
Felix
I didn’t see driving a motorcycle for the first time ever in the tea leaves for this evening, but I refuse to let Torren drive. He was stubborn, but eventually relented because he knew he shouldn’t drive, too.
I must be going 25 miles per hour. A horse and buggy would pass me at this point, but I don’t give a shit. Nobody is dying on my watch! If I have to push this thing back to the shop, so be it.
Fortunately, that isn’t necessary. We finally arrive at Torren’s shop, and he clicks the button for the garage. We hop off, and I wheel it inside before closing the garage door again. The lights are bright, and I can see just how wrecked Torren looks.
I don’t know what happened, and he won’t tell me anything, but I’m not going anywhere.
“Come on.” I lead him upstairs, and he follows in a daze. Once we’re in his room, his gaze turns to me, and my heart almost shatters at the lost expression on his face.
I wrap my hand around his waist and lead him to bed. Oncehe’s sitting, I untie his boots and fall on my ass trying to pull them off.
Smooth, Felix.
I help him lie down, then drape the sheets over him. “What do you need? Want some water or anything?”
Torren just looks up at the ceiling, his eyes glassy and vacant. He has to be thirsty, so I rise to fetch some water, but he grabs my wrist. “Please. Don’t go.”
He looks so scared. Jesus, I’d do anything to take the pain away. “I’m not going anywhere. I was just going to get you a glass of water.”
Torren’s eyes never leave mine, and his hand doesn’t let go. “Come right back?” he asks.
I lean forward and kiss his forehead. “Absolutely. I promise.”
He reluctantly lets go, and I hurry to the bathroom and fill a glass with some water. Once I return, I set it on the table next to him, kick off my shoes, and jump into bed, pulling him closer and letting him rest his head on me.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers.
