I lifted my head, meeting his devastated gaze. Last night he looked at me with heat in his eyes as he made love to me repeatedly. That seemed like a distant memory.
“I… I don’t think I’m ready to go back to bed,” I whispered. “Can I sit in the den for a bit?”
“Of course, precious,” Ben said, giving my pinky a little squeeze.
“I don’t want to keep you up,” I said, shame curling in my stomach.
“We want to be with you,” Theo said firmly. “Unless… unless you want to be alone?” His voice sounded strained.
“No!” I said, panic filling me at the thought.
“Not leaving you,” Cam said with an air of possession.
Memories of nightmare-Cam tried to encroach. I needed to replace them with something good. I released Ben’s finger and shakily held out my arms to Cam.
“Will you carry me?” My heart was pounding, and my scent was bitter with stress.
“Always,” Cam grunted out.
With tremendous tenderness, he scooped me up. I wrapped my arms and legs around him and breathed in big gulps of his scent. This was Cam,myCam, who was so worried about hurting me I had to goad him into having sex. My Cam, who had been so tender while he dominated me. I rubbed my face against his neck, scent-marking him. I needed their scents covering me, grounding me. I tightened my hold and he responded in kind, exhaling a deep breath.
“I love you, baby girl.”
“Love you so much.”
I wanted to apologize to all of them for my reaction, for waking them, and upsetting them, but I knew they would just growl at me and tell me I had nothing to be sorry about. The ghost of a smile tugged at the corner of my mouth.
Cam settled down on the sectional with me still wrapped around him. I reached my arms out on either side of me, needing to feel Ben and Theo. They were there immediately, pressing their bodies against mine. Theo’s hand threaded in my hair, and Ben held me around my waist. For a moment, it was too much. Reminders of being held down in the nightmare flooded me. The guys stiffened, noting my distress. I forced myself to take a deep breath, inhaling their scents.You’re safe, you’re safe.
“It’s okay,” I said, my muscles unclenching.
I knew the guys were dying to ask me what had happened, but they refrained, simply caressing me and planting tender kisses on my skin. I needed to tell them everything. If I didn’t do it now, I would chicken out.
“Glen Jacoby has been a friend of my parents for a long time.” I kept my face pressed into Cam’s neck, eyes closed, focusing on their scents to keep me grounded. I felt Cam’s breathing hitch before he relaxed again.
“When I was younger, he was at the house a lot. I realize now he was working with my parents to plan the Designation Government takeover. I hated being at home anyway, so I tried to stay out of the house or in my room. But sometimes, my parents would force me to come down and sit through these long, formal dinners. Glen would almost always be there, along with a group of their friends. Director Whiteburn was there once, and several other people who now have government positions. But I remember Glen the most. He was the loudest, always saying anti-omega things.
“After I revealed, the insults became more pointed. He mocked my body, talked about how much I was eating, and gave my parents suggestions on how to control me better. He acted like he hated me. But sometimes, I would catch him staring and it felt… I don’t know. It felt like he was a predator and I was his prey. His eyes tracked me all the time.”
Cam vibrated underneath me, and I heard Ben’s sharp intake of breath. I glanced over at Theo, who was sitting stiffly, a blank mask on his face.
“When the Designation Government came into power and founded the Academy, I was in the first class mandated to attend. At first, it was like a strict boarding school. But then things got worse.”
My throat felt like it was closing up. I’d never shared the full story of what happened to anyone besides Sam, and I had been drunk when I had told him. Cam pressed a gentle kiss to my temple.
“They implemented a whole system of punishments. If you didn’t follow their rules, they would take away your weekend privileges, meaning you could never leave campus. They would also strip your room of anything comfortable, like blankets and pillows. You already know about the meal plan they put me on.”
My three alphas growled.
“We got word that they were going to start doing… medical exams on us. Specifically, pelvic exams to make sure we were virgins.”
“Fuckers,” Cam snarled.
I squeezed my eyes shut and clenched my hands tightly, pushing ahead.
“I made a few friends while there—Poppy and… Genevieve.” God, even saying her name was painful.
“Our rooms were next to each other, and we had classes together. Poppy was only there for two months before she bonded with her alphas. She left before things got bad. When Genevieve and I found out the medical exams were scheduled to start, we decided to escape. We couldn’t make it another year and a half, and we’d been punished so much that we hadn’t been allowed to do any pack interviews. We were trapped. So we planned out the whole thing, but the night before we planned to go, the guards came to my room. They said Genevieve told them about our plans to escape. She betrayed me.” I choked on those last words, the pain as fresh as it had been years ago. Cam’s chest vibrated with a steady growl, and I wasn’t sure any of them were breathing.
