As soon as they left, I pulled out my earbuds and immediately searched for the interview. My stomach was in knots as my thumb hovered above the screen before I hitPLAYon the first video to pop up.
“Describe your dream defense,” the interviewer asked.
“And I know how this is going to sound, but I’m being real with you… The men I line up with every day is my dream defense,” Lamar answered. “We have something special. The Monarchs are something special.”
“How did you know the Monarchs had something special?”
“The work ethic from everyone from front office to the coaches to the players—the way everybody goes so hard is how I knew it was a special organization I was joining.”
“Describe your dream woman,” the interviewer asked.
“My dream woman is the woman who speaks to every part of me and compels me to want to do everything I can for her.”
“And how will you know she’s special?”
“A beautiful, smart, passionate woman who’s knowledgeable about football and quotes Malcolm X is undeniable.”
“Quotes Malcolm X? That’s oddly specific.”
Lamar’s smile grew. “My dad drilled the words ‘for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today’ in my head as a kid, and that became my motto. That’s why I work so hard. So, to find a woman who randomly in conversation drops that quote…”
“It seemed like you were thinking about somebody in particular… which brings me to my next point. Some are saying that all the attention about your dating life is a distraction. Why do you think that is?” the interviewer asked.
“Because people are distracted by it,” he answered, before clarifying. “People. Not me.”
“Are you worried about how that distraction is going to impact your game?”
“I’m not distracted. And if someone else is distracted by trying to figure out who I choose to spend my life with, that doesn’t have anything to do with me.”
“Even if it isn’t a distraction for you specifically, there’s been evidence of how publicly speculated relationships distract from the game—look at what has happened in the past with girlfriends like Jessica, Kim, and Taylor and the negative impact the perception of their presence brought to the player and the game—unfairly, I may add. So have you considered the opportunities impacted from the spectacle of it all?”
“I don’t see how or why that would be the case in this situation,” Lamar answered. “But I stand by the fact that what’s for me is for me.”
“Did you know there were people who questioned your decision making?”
Before the interviewer could continue, Lamar shook his head irritably. “Yeah, I heard that.”
“So, you knew about the campaign to not vote for you for Defensive Player of the Month because a group of people didn’t like who they thought you were partnered with?”
Lamar couldn’t disguise the confusion that crumpled his eyebrows. “What?”
“Unfortunately, some are saying you would’ve held the honor if it weren’t for that collective effort.”
He shifted uncomfortably as he stared into the camera in disbelief. “I… uh, I hadn’t heard that.”
“What are your thoughts on that?”
“I can’t wrap my mind around something like that. My play on the field is my play on the field. My personal life shouldn’t have anything to do with…” He shook his head and let his sentence trail off. “It is what it is,” he concluded.
My heart ached as I watched a mixture of confusion and disappointment contort his face before he swiped it with his hand.
I felt sick.
The phrasesocial pariahkept swirling around in my head as the outcome I’d been trying to avoid bubbled to the surface.
“Do you think the attention you’re getting and the expectations other people have for you and your partner will continue to take away from your career moving forward?”
Lamar seemed to tense for a moment as the question hit him. “Like I said, if someone else is getting distracted by my personal life, that’s on them. So that’s a question you’d have to ask them. But career wise, my only job is to perform at my highest level.” He exhaled and leaned forward, closer to the camera. “Football has always been my first love. I’ve dedicated everything to getting to this point in my career. So no, I’m not distracted by anything that’s being said about me.”
