Greg and Nathan took their seats at the table, not saying a word. The rest of the dinner was tense, with everyone avoiding eye contact and pushing their food around, taking bites here and there. I should have left, only staying because I knew how worried my mother was, even though I was livid with her. I knew what a big deal this was, and how concerned she was.
But I hated every second of the rest of that awkward dinner. Everyone seemed to know more about my life than I did, which was something I wasn’t used to. I usually had control over my life, or at least the narrative, but now it felt like I was losing control of everything. This unborn baby was ruining my life already, and it wasn’t even here yet.
Chapter 29
Gabriella
The elevator doors opened and I quickly stepped into the office, looking around to make sure no one was there. It was 6 a.m., so it was highly doubtful anyone was here yet. No one wanted to subject themselves to this miserable place more than they had to, now that Chandler was in charge. I didn’t blame them. That was why I was here. To get my things and get the hell out.
I was still in the sweat shorts and an oversized tee I had slept in, too tired and sick to care what I looked like when there was a slim chance of seeing anybody anyway. The security officer raised an awkward brow, but other than that the building was pretty much empty. The office lights were dim as I headed down the hallway to my office. As I opened the door and flipped the switch, I looked around the mid-century-decorated space.
It had been such a triumph when I was offered my own office. I had spent so much time working on it to make it my own, evenhiring a designer to make it perfect. Now, as I looked at the clean lines of my warm wooden desk and the abstract chandelier that had taken months to arrive, I felt defeated. I felt like I was giving up.
Since telling Chandler I was pregnant, the tension of being here at the office was weighing on me. I already didn’t feel great from the morning sickness and the stress of the surprise of the baby, that coming into work and feeling even more emotions didn’t seem healthy. For me or the baby.
I was always walking on eggshells, glancing over at Chandler’s office hoping I would get something from him.Anything.But I was met with iciness and harsh commands when he actually did speak to me. If I had thought he was an asshole before, he was on an entirely different level now. I hated him for it.
I hated that he thought that he was the only one in this predicament. There were two people who made the choice that night at the gala, and every time after that. To put the blame entirely on me was unfair, but it wasn’t surprising that Chandler wouldn’t take accountability. I don’t think I had ever once heard him say “sorry” in the time we had worked together, to me or anyone else.
Sighing, I sunk into my desk chair and looked around the office I was about to abandon for the time being. I couldn’t work here anymore, not when things were so tense. Working from home would be my best option for now, until things blew over, although I wasn’t sure being pregnant was something you could just get over.
On the nearby bookshelf, I spotted a photo of my father and me when I was fresh out of college. He looked so proud, his smile practically radiating from the photo, and I was just looking at him, eating up his pride. I had always wanted to make him so proud, but now things were just “off” between us. Ever since he took my opportunity away from me and handed it to someone else, I didn’t feel that pride anymore, and I was too defeated to work for it anymore.
I knew once he caught wind of me working from home, he would have questions, but I didn’t care. He wasn’t the boss anymore. He didn’t have a say in how his business was run, even if I was his daughter. He made that choice and had to live with it.
I glanced at the clock on the wall. It was only 6:15, but I started to pack up, no longer wanting to sit and sadly reminisce about what I thought my life would be. I slipped my laptop in my large work tote, along with a few items from my desk. I grabbed a couple things from my bookshelf, leaving the photo of my father and me behind. It wasn’t like I was going to be gone forever. It was just temporary.
I had emailed Chandler the night before, letting him know my decision. I kept it professional and to the point, leaving out any personal details of my choice in case HR had any questions. All I received back wasK.He didn’t even bother signing his name. It irritated me, but at least he wasn’t pissed off. I was sure he wanted me out of here just as much as I wanted it.
I grabbed my heavy tote bag and slung it over my shoulder, closing my office door behind me. As I turned, I walked into something solid. Something familiar. I looked up at Chandler,who looked just as surprised as I felt. I really needed to be better about looking where I was going.
“Wh-what are you doing here?” I stammered, taking a step back.
“Couldn’t sleep,” he said curtly. I noticed the five o’clock shadow on his normally clean-shaven face. He looked tired.
I nodded, knowing the feeling. He glanced at my pajamas and the tote bag hanging over my shoulder before looking behind me toward my office. I clutched my tote bag tighter, damning myself for showing up like this. Why did he have to look so good, even when he had bags under his eyes? He made bags and scruff look good.
I wished he would fill the silence that felt like it was suffocating me. He owed me that much, but instead he turned toward his office and shut the door behind him. My eyes stung with tears as they stared at his closed wooden door that felt like it had just put miles between us. How could he be so cold? I shook my head in silent frustration, shoving down the hurt I hated to admit was there.
I walked swiftly to the elevator, desperate to leave after what had just happened. Before I stepped through the open doors, I said a silent goodbye to the place I had practically lived at for years. I shouldn’t be the one leaving. It should be Chandler, but I just had to accept that life wasn’t always fair. The past week had been a cruel reminder of that, ever since I was staring at three positive pregnancy tests.
The work week flew by faster than I expected, and I found that I actually enjoyed working from home. I could stay in sweatpants or pajama bottoms all day, only putting on a blouse if I had a video call. I could snack whenever I pleased, which seemed like every five minutes at the moment. I could put on a guilty pleasure sitcom in the background. I could even take a fifteen-minute nap if my schedule allowed. It was really the perfect situation for my first trimester when all I wanted to do was throw up, eat, and sleep.
I still had to communicate with Chandler, given I was still his “handler” or whatever bullshit title my father had given me. Now that I was working at home, he filled up my calendar again with tasks to keep me busy. But we stuck to emails and texts, which was much easier than having to see him every day or hear his voice.
I realized that being around him wasn’t a good idea when I had such a big decision to make. I didn’t need any old feelings I might have had muster up inside me. As much as I hated him now, there was a time my heart skipped when I heard his footsteps down the hall or my mouth fought the battle of its life, trying to hold back a smile when his eyes found mine. I didn’t need to be reminded of that when there was a baby growing inside me.
I was still in disbelief about that, eagerly awaiting and dreading my next doctor appointment when I knew it would feel all that more real. Ultrasound photos and heartbeats and more serious conversations. It felt so overwhelming, especially when I had to do it on my own.
As I debated taking a ten-minute nap or completing a menial task Chandler had sent me regarding unsubscribing from certain emails, my phone buzzed on my makeshift desk of a coffee table. I swallowed hard. It was my father. He had been calling the past few days, seemingly after he caught wind that I left the charity golf event early and that I had been working from home. I wondered if Chandler had told him, though I highly doubted it. He didn’t need to raise any suspicions any more than I did.
I ignored my father’s call, sending him to voicemail as I had been the past few days. A few moments later, my phone buzzed with a notification. I sighed as I hit play, bracing myself for his message.
“Gabriella. It’s me. Your father. Remember me? Look, I’m worried about you. This isn’t like you. Please, let me know you’re okay. I love you.”
I felt a lump form in my throat as I locked my phone, the screen going dark. Despite everything that had happened with my father in recent months, he was still my father. I missed him. I needed him. Being pregnant was the scariest thing I had ever been through, and it felt foreign not to have him or my mother to lean on for such a big event. I just couldn’t bring myself to tell them, though. My mother, maybe, she was still out of state with my grandmother. But I didn’t want to burden her. Plus, I doubted she could keep a secret like that from my father, nor was it fair to ask her to.
I didn’t know what he would do if he found out I was pregnant, and with his new CEO’s baby of all people. It was enough to make me want to hurl my guts out, and it had nothing to do withmorning sickness. It felt like everything in my life was coming to a head, and I was so unprepared for all of it.
