“Jessie, talk to me. You’re scaring me.”
I look up at Carson and my stomach drops. I can see the worry in his eyes as he scans me, looking for anything physically wrong.
“I’m not hurt. I just—I don’t think I can keep living like this.” My voice is raw from crying, and I know I’m not making any sense.
Carson pulls me up and out of the car. He wraps me in a hug. Holding tightly, he asks, “Living like what?”
I’ve never told anyone. Not everything. I don’t even know where to begin. But if there is one person who will listen, it’s Carson.
“If I tell you, you can’t do anything. I don’t want anyone involved.”
Carson pulls back. “Is this about Trey?”
I almost laugh. I wish my biggest problem in life was a cowboy. “No. This . . . This has been going on for years, but you can’t help. No one can.”
“I can try, and if I can’t, we’ll find someone who can. You need to let somebody help you with whatever this is. At least talk to me. Let’s start there.”
I decide it’s time. It’s time to tell someone. Things have gotten worse over the summer, and now the cops are showing up. I’m not sleeping, and I work more hours than my body can handle. I just drove to the middle of nowhere to have a fucking mental breakdown.
I can’t do this anymore.
“The reason I work so much is because my father makes me give him money.”
Carson goes stiff but doesn’t say a word, giving me space to talk.
“Once I started college, he began keeping tabs on me. When I got my nursing job, after a couple paychecks, he showed up demanding money. At first I refused—told him I didn’t have extra money. I’d just bought the house, Gran needed help, and that was the truth. But then he threatened me . . . he scared the shit out of me, so I started working an extra shift here or there. He would take a couple hundred and disappear for a few weeks. Then that turned into an extra shift every week, then two, and well . . . you know.” I twist the hem of my shirt as I word vomit. Now that I’ve started, I can’t stop. It’s like an avalanche. Every word releases pressure from deep in my chest.
“Now he takes thousands. He takeseverything, Carson. I have no savings—I can’t pay my student debt down, credit card debt is stacking up. I’m drowning trying to just take care of Gran and myself, but I’m terrified of him. He wanted me to get even more money from Trey, but I said no. Trey figured out he was coming around and confronted him, telling him to leave me alone. That’s when Daryl broke his truck windows.”
Carson’s eyes flare. I knew Trey lied to everyone about the windows. He lied to protect me.
“After that, Daryl showed up at the hospital threatening to hurt Trey. He’s never shown up at the hospital before. He was so angry, I got scared and—and I kicked Trey out. I didn’t have a choice, but I had to be so horrible to him to get him to leave. Now he’ll probably never forgive me, and I miss him so much.” My words are coming in gasps—choked, and desperate.
The concern in Carson’s eyes has shifted to anger. His voice has an edge to it when he asks, “Trey knew about this and left anyway?”
“No,” I quickly say. “Trey didn’t know everything. All he knew was Daryl had been bothering me. That’s what led to their altercation, and his truck windows being broken. But, I promise he only thought Daryl was harassing me. He had no idea about the money, hospital, or how long this has been going on. He never would’ve left if he did, you know that. That’s why I didn’t tell him.”
“Who have you told?”
I glance away. “You.”
“You’ve been carrying this by yourself all these years?”
“Yes,” I whisper.
He pulls me into another hug. “I’m so sorry, Jessie. I wish you would’ve told me—told anyone. You don’t have to do this alone.”
“He’s dangerous, Carson. You can’t tell anyone. Promise me you won’t tell anyone.”
He releases me. “How dangerous? I mean, I know the rumors, but . . . has he hurt you?”
I shake my head. I’m not diving into my childhood right now. “No, he just intimidates me and takes money, but I’ve seen the people he’s sent to the ER. He isn’t afraid to hurt someone to send a message.”
Carson drags his hand down his beard. “And you haven’t gone to the police because you’re afraid of what Daryl will do?”
“Yes, because this doesn’t just affect me. If I piss him off, I’m worried he’ll go for Gran or Kacey or Trey. That’s how he’s always kept me paying him. He doesn’t only threaten me, but my people.”
“I know you don’t want to hear this, but you need to go to the police, Jessie. We can make sure everyone stays safe, but this can’t continue.”
