“I see. What else do you enjoy?”
What does she mean? I don’t do anything but go to school and come home. “Um, I don’t really do anything else. Just school. Kacey invites me for sleepovers sometimes, but Dad won’t let me go.”
She nods and looks like she’s thinking hard. “Are you happy here? At home?”
I fidget again. I’m not supposed to—Dad hates when I fidget. The sleeve of my shirt comes up and her eyes go wide when she sees the bruise Dad left.
“Jessie, honey, what happened to your arm?”
I pull the sleeve down, unsure what to say.
“It’s okay, you can tell me. You won’t get in trouble.”
“I forgot to take out the trash. Dad got mad.” I shrug.
“Does he get mad a lot?”
“Yeah, but it’s okay, I’ve got a system.” I’m not sure why I’m telling her this. She just seems so kind, and she’s my grandmother, so it’s probably okay, right?
“What kind of system?”
“I hide outside and in the garage a lot. As long as I do my chores and stay out of the way, it’s okay.”
Oh no.She has tears in her eyes. What did I say?
“Jessie, I’m so sorry, baby. I want to help you, if you’ll let me.”
“Help how?”
“Well, I have a big ol’ empty house in town. Your grandfather passed away some time ago, and it’s very lonely. I would love it if you came and stayed with me. We can cook, plant flowers, and you can have sleepovers with Kacey.”
“But . . . what about Mom and Dad?”
“I’ll talk to them. I’m sure they won’t mind. They seem very busy, and I would love nothing more than for you to spend some time with me. You’d be safe with me.”
Safe.
I want to be safe. I’m tired of hiding from Dad and being hungry all the time. Mom never talks to me, and I want sleepovers with Kacey more than anything.
“Do you have food?”
“Yes, we can get any food you like.” She bats away a tear.
I nod. “And Dad won’t get mad?”
“You let me worry about your father.”
“Okay . . . I’ll come with you. For a little while, at least.”
I startle when she pulls me into a hug. “I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner. I promise I’ll take care of you now.”
I wake from my dream of the day Gran came and got me. I don’t remember falling asleep. After I took a shower last night, I ended up in Trey’s old bed. The pillowcase smelled like him, and it made me feel less alone.
At nine years old, I didn’t know it then, but that was the day my life changed forever. I never went back. I don’t know what she said to my father, but I didn’t see him again until after I turned eighteen. I haven’t heard from my mother since.
Gran told me about their falling out when I got older. When Mom got into drugs, Gran and Gramps tried everything to help her, but she wouldn’t take it. You can’t help someone who doesn’t want help. My mom ended up pushing them further and further away until one day she stopped speaking to them altogether. Gran still loved her, though. She told me stories about my mom growing up. I always listened, but it was hard. My mom never visited me, never took care of me, never loved me.
After that, Gran and Gramps retired and started traveling for months at a time. She heard I was born through the town rumor mill. It wasn’t until I was nine and Gramps died, and she came back to Cottonwood Valley and heard aboutthe skinny, dirty Hawkins girlthat she came to get me. She said she was in line at the grocery store and left all her groceries on the conveyor belt to come and get me as fast as she could.
