Ethan watched her with concerned kindness. “Don’t do this alone, Emma.”
“No, I won’t…. I wouldn’t….” Hell. Shewouldhave tried to face Gordon alone. She had thought she was alone. “I can’t stay here,” she admitted quietly.
Kay gave her a bleak look. “I understand.” Then she walked across the room to stand by Emma’s side. “We’ll help.”
ChapterTwenty-Three
Zach satat the big kitchen table, not looking at Elizabeth or Riley. He had returned from his furious, heartbroken, half-mindless hike through the Brecon Beacons to find Emma long gone.
She’d actually done it. She’d broken her promises and left.
He took a long sip of his whisky, letting it burn all the way down. It probably was a pity to be throwing back the twenty-five-year-old single malt without even tasting it, but he didn’t care. Cold roast lamb sat on the table with a loaf of bread—the remains of the lunch that no one had eaten—but the last thing he wanted was food.
Elizabeth and Riley had spent the last hour talking to each other in low voices, but now, finally, they’d fallen silent. Neither of them spoke to him. Or looked at him. Riley had even turned her chair slightly so that her back was to him. Which suited him fine. He didn’t want to talk to them either.
He’d tried going up to the room they’d been staying to sit by himself, but it was too full of Emma. It smelled like her. The sheets were still rumpled from her body. She’d left a pair of earrings on the small dresser and he could remember her wearing them the day before. It took him less than thirty seconds to walk back out, make his way to the kitchen, and find the whisky.
Hours had passed since Emma left, but, in some ways, it felt like only minutes. He could still hear his words hanging in the air. Could still see the stricken look on her face.
His heart felt as if it had splintered into two jagged pieces that were scraping roughly against each other with every breath. One broken piece that would live half a life in his chest, and a second piece that would always be hers.
He’d hurt her. Again. He’d known it even as he said the words. But he couldn’t—wouldn’t—help her challenge Gordon. It was a fight she could never win. Nothing on earth could induce him to take her to the monster who had already caused so much damage and offer her up like some kind of sacrifice.
He swallowed another burning mouthful. What was Emma doing? Her ticket was booked to take her back to Bournemouth. She’d get there soon, and then she would get a cab the rest of the way home.
She’d taken Gordon’s number but then she’d left almost immediately afterward to catch her train. She wouldn’t try to contact her father while she was traveling, surrounded by other passengers. No, she’d go home and then call him. She’d almost certainly wait until the morning and do it in daylight.
It gave Zach a small window. As soon as Kay came back, they had to go and see James and then contact Gordon together. They’d been hiding for too long. It was time to act. Before Emma could put herself in danger.
She might hate him. Fuck, the look on her face when he said goodbye had nearly destroyed him. But he would not take her to Gordon. He simply couldn’t do it.
This way, she would go home. She might contact Gordon, but Zach would make sure all her father’s attention would already be focused where it should be—on him. He would destroy the Council and remove Gordon from power, and then, for the rest of his life, he would know she was safe. And if he failed, at least she was well out of it.
The front door opened and slammed shut. Ethan and Kay stepped into the kitchen in silence, but he ignored their glares.
Kay found a pair of tumblers and poured them each a glass of single malt as they lowered themselves into the chairs opposite his. “What the hell, Zach?”
Zach shrugged and took another sip. It was his second glass and when it was finished, he would be done. He wanted to drink enough to take the edge off, but not so much that he couldn’t think. Now that Kay was back, they needed to get moving.
“Zach, man, that was….” Ethan ran his hand through his dark hair. “That was brutal.”
Zach leaned back in his chair and folded his arms over his chest. “I’m not offering her up to Gordon. Frankly, all of you”—he glared around the room—“should have supported me more. If you had told her that she shouldn’t go after Gordon instead of encouraging her, it wouldn’t have come to this.”
Kay snorted, but she did not sound at all amused. “It was always going to come to this.Youshould have supported her.”
“No.” He shook his head, ignoring the way his Shadows lurched. “The most important thing is that she’s safe. She’ll go home and I’ll put an end to this shit with Gordon. Then he can never bother her again.”
“You made her think she wasn’t one of us,” Kay said quietly.
That wasn’t right. He hadn’t made Emma think that she wasn’t one of them. He’d been trying to help her. “I had to explain why it would be dangerous—”
“You’ve never been part of this world,” Elizabeth said softly.
“What?” Zach demanded.
“That’s what you said, Zach. ‘You’ve never been part of this world.’”
God. Had he really put it like that? When he knew how much she’d suffered. How alone she’d been, and how anxious she was about meeting his friends.
