He turned and climbed back into the car and closed his eyes. He didn’t care how long he had to wait. He was never going into Elizabeth’s house. He was going back to Bryn’s house to get strong. And then he was going after Gordon.
ChapterTwenty-Two
Emma stretched,luxuriating in the glow of connection—to herself, to her Shadows, and most especially, to Zach.
Everything about the morning had been perfect. Waking up together. Their slow, sensuous exploration of each other’s bodies while their Shadows twined together. The breakfast Zach brought up on a tray for her with a rose cut from Elizabeth’s garden. Fitting themselves into the tiny shower together and then laughing as they dashed across the corridor in their towels, rushing to get back to the spare room without being seen. Going straight back to bed and immediately getting dirty all over again.
It was glorious. But it had to end eventually. They had to go down and help Elizabeth to prepare lunch. James would be coming and there were a lot of mouths to feed. And, as much as she didn’t want to think about it, she would have to leave when lunch was over.
Her train tickets were booked and her plans were made. She was due to travel back to Swanage, leaving Zach and the others to ramp up their efforts to find Gordon. They were going to London in the morning, taking the battle to the Council and then on from there.
The thought of going home without Zach made her chest tighten to the point of pain. How was she going to leave him? He needed her as much as she needed him. But she couldn’t bear the idea of hiding in Wales alone. Becky was expecting her in the morning, and Zach was determined that she would be better off far away from the battle against her father. Maybe he was right. Unless she had something to contribute, it probably was best for her to be safely away.
Zach tucked his shirt into his jeans and pulled on his boots while she finished brushing her hair. He was frowning as he tied his laces, his face stern and so familiar. She could trace that deep furrow with her eyes closed. She knew the texture of his rough jaw and the way his muscles moved when he crossed his arms. But more than that, she knew him. Her Shadows chose him, andshechose him.
He must have sensed her disquiet, or perhaps he felt the same unsettled, half-formed fears. He wrapped his hand firmly around hers and stayed close to her as they made their way down the stairs into the living room.
They stepped inside, and the last remnants of their pleasant morning faded. A woman with curly auburn hair was weeping quietly while Elizabeth spoke to her in gentle tones and Ethan held her hand. But both Kay and James were missing.
“Riley, what are you doing here?” Zach asked.
Emma vaguely remembered Zach mentioning that Riley was their Healer from the London Circle. As far as she could recall, Riley had only moved to Highgate a few months before. Zach had spoken of her as if he didn’t know her very well.
Riley looked up, her eyes red and swollen as she blew her nose. “Nothing makes any sense.”
Elizabeth patted Riley on the back. “We’ve just been explaining about how Gordon brought blood Shadows back into the world.”
“No.” Riley shook her head. “I understand about the blood Shadows. I don’t understand why James didn’t tell me any of this. Never. In all the time.”
Zach pulled his hand free from Emma’s to cross his arms. “Riley, are you and James together?” he asked in a low voice.
“Yes. No…. I thought we were.”
“Then why didn’t we know?” Zach demanded. “I am—I was—his best friend.” Zach’s usual stern mask slipped, and his distress was written over his face. Or perhaps only Emma could see just how much this new secret was hurting him.
“James asked me to keep it secret,” Riley admitted. “It was new, we’d only been together a few weeks when his project for the Council started taking over all his time. I haven’t seen him since the week after Kay’s battle in Oxford Street. But we still spoke every day. He texted and e-mailed. And then, one day, he just… stopped.”
“A secret apartment, a secret mission for Gordon, and now a secret girlfriend. Fuck.” Zach shook his head in disbelief and Emma leaned closer to him, wishing she still held his hand. Wishing she could support him somehow.
“I’m sorry, Riley, but he lied to all of us,” Zach muttered. His voice sounded angry, but Emma could hear the betrayal that underpinned his words.
She reached out to touch Zach, to comfort him, settling her hand on his arm. But a flicker of images fluttered over her awareness. For the first time, they didn’t pour over her in a barrage, attacking and overwhelming her. Instead, it was like noticing a butterfly in the garden. She could choose to look at it, or she could ignore it and let it fly away.
She tightened her grip and closed her eyes. But she didn’t see a vision or any kind of revelation. All she saw was James’s face, drawn and sad and filled with self-hatred. It wasn’t the face of a dangerous manipulator. It was the face of someone who felt terribly alone. She opened her eyes and the image faded, but the feeling of devastation remained. What if there was a good reason for all his secrecy?
Emma turned to Zach and took his hand back in hers. “I think James was trying to do the right thing.”
Zach’s scowl deepened. “There’s no justification for deceiving your closest friends.”
Emma wrinkled her nose at him. “James believed he was doing the work of the Council. He also said that everything he did was to protect Kay. And you. I think that was true. And I think he kept their relationship secret to protect Riley.”
Riley wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “How did secrets and lies protect us?”
“None of you know Gordon like I do. He will take anything—everything—that you have to offer, and more than you could possibly afford. He’ll use you until you’re destroyed.”
Emma smiled sadly. She’d always known her father was poisonous, but the flood of memories that came with her Healing the previous day had given her a brutal new clarity. “Gordon doesn’t just manipulate. He uses his Shadows to hypnotize you into thinking you’re doing the right thing. But even when James was following those orders, somewhere deep inside him, he knew they were wrong. He wanted to keep you all away from danger, otherwise why not just hand you over like Gordon wanted? I think James was trying to help you. He did it in all the wrong ways, but he was trying to protect you.”
“What do you mean, hypnotize?” Riley asked slowly.
