“How could younotknow that!” she cried. “How could younotknow that I was as broken-hearted as the rest of you, that I still am?”
“Shush, child, let me finish, please.”
Karen sat back rigidly in her seat.
“All this time, I thought that you were trying to keep this house to get the better of us – of me, even. That you were determined to fight to the death for it, just to prevent us from getting our hands on it. It was only when I heard you talking to Shane the other day that I realised exactly why you’re doing this. You’re trying to hold onto him, aren’t you Karen? You’re trying to preserve all that you have left of him– your memories.”
Karen looked away; her eyes brimming with unshed tears as Nellie leant across the space between them for her hand. “But, pet, that won’t work – Shane is gone. There’s only one place you can keep those memories safe, and that’s in your heart.”
She squeezed her hand. “When Patrick died, at first I wouldn’t let anyone near anything belonging to him. I wouldn’t let them get rid of his things – you know the way people always make you do that? They tell you that it’s for the best, that it’ll be easier, but how do they know? How do they know that it’ll be easier? They don’t knowhow it feels – how you feel, when it’s like someone has sliced you in two, taken away one half and told you to fend for yourself with the part that’s left.” Nellie’s eyes now too brimmed with tears. “Love, I did you a great disservice when Shane died because I leftyouto fend for yourself. I’m sorry; I should have helped you, I should have known what you were going through. Because I went through it myself.”
At this, Karen slumped heavily back on the chair; her body heaving with sobs that couldn’t come. When they finally did, Nellie went to her and held her close and the two women wept together – at last sharing their mutual grief.
“I’m sorry too,” Karen sniffed, after a little while. “What you said there was true for me also. When Shane died, I didn’t give a toss about what you were feeling, I was too wrapped up in myself and so determined to keep you away from the house.”
“There’s two of us in it, and we’re as bad as one another. At this stage, there’s no point in going back over it. What’s done is done, and we’ve both made mistakes.”
They sat in silence for a bit longer, each comfortable in their shared truce, until eventually, Nellie patted her hand.
“Sure stick on the kettle now and the two of us will have a chat about the house and sort something out between us woman to woman.” Wiping away tears, Karen duly stood up. But as she walked towards the kitchen, she heard Shane’s mother give one of her trademarksniffs. “So are you going to tidy this place up,” she mumbled, “or will it be left to me, as usual?”
Karen looked back sharply and then let out a chuckle of relief when she saw the twinkle in Nellie’s eyes, and a devilish smile playing about her lips.
Shane would be so proud of them both.
65
Jenny struggled with directions while trying to block out the sound of Holly babbling along to a song on the car radio.
“King’s Green, King’s Lawn – where the bloody hell is King’s Terrace?” she muttered impatiently and then instantly put a hand to her mouth.
She was a very bad mother. If Holly’s next words were ‘bloody’ or ‘feck’ then she had only herself to blame.
She finally located the correct street to meet the agent about the two-bed townhouse that could well be their new home. The ‘To Let’ sign affixed to a wall at the end house confirmed that she was in the right place.
Jenny checked her watch. It was two-forty, she was ten minutes late and there was no sign of the agent. Had she missed him?
“Terrific,” she grumbled out loud and Holly chuckled contentedly in the car seat. “Oh, you might think it’sfunny now Missy, but if Mummy doesn’t find somewhere for us to live soon, we might have to donate all your toys.”
The baby was silent on cue as Jenny rummaged for her phone to call the agent. She was certain she’d left in on the passenger seat. Or had she put it in the glove compartment?
“Da-Da. Da-Da,” the baby continued singing giddily. “Da-Da.”
“He’s not here, hon,” Jenny replied absentmindedly. Frustrated, she unfastened her seatbelt to search beneath the seat. When she heard a knock on the driver’s window, she popped up with a start and bumped her head on the roof.
“Jesus!” she gasped, rolling down the driver’s window.
“Not Jesus,” Mike said. “Sorry to disappoint you.” He shifted his gaze to the back seat. “Hello, honey.”
Jenny’s thoughts raced through her mind like a horse at Cheltenham. What was he doing here? And how did he know they were here?
For one terrible second, the thought crept into her mind that he might attempt to snatch Holly. Then she calmed herself. Mike wouldn’t dream of doing anything like that.
Would he?
“This is a coincidence,” she said as calmly as she could muster. “Are you meeting a client around this area or something?”
“No, I came here to see you two, actually,” he saidresting one arm on the roof of the car. “I think we need to talk.”
