It’s so overwhelming I burst out crying, so filled with gratitude and love.
“Mo run,” he whispers lovingly, thrusting higher the emotional roller-coaster I am firmly strapped in.
“I love you so much,” I say through a hiccup.
He sits next to me, pulling me onto his lap and kisses the top of my head. I bury myself into him, knowing nothing bad could ever happen to me. He’d massacre every threat long before it could harm me.
I search his eyes, wanting to see the truth about how he feels about my pregnancy.
He has been counting my bodily changes with me. My nipples are darker, more swollen, and I have cravings in the middle of the night, and I switch moods like I am aiming to win a competition.
The early signs are only the beginning.
We never really talked about starting a family. It’s been two years since we got married, and thoughts cram into my head, worry nagging at me. Is it too soon? Did he have enough time to heal that deep-seated wound? Is he ready? I know I am not. Even without being a preschool teacher, no one truly is, but humanity has reproduced and become parents since our inception.
He places his palm on my belly, eyes lighting up, soothing my anguish while I cry some more. Good God, the pendulum swings from one extreme to the other—emotionally I am all over the place.
“I am a hot mess, and it’s just the beginning. You won’t love me by the end…” I can’t even finish my thought, afraid I will choke on my words.
He chuckles low in his throat and tips my chin up. The love burning in his eyes resembles a flame that nothing could ever extinguish.
“Nothing could ever make me stop loving you,” he says softly. “You are pregnant and your body will go through changes to accommodate my child. The life we created.”
“Are you okay with that? Like, really okay?” I don’t break eye contact, seeking not only confirmation but our deep connection.
His brows furrow, a deep sigh heaving his chest. “I’m not okay with your throwing up. I am not okay with not knowing how to help you make the entire process easier. But what I will always be okay with is you growing a piece of our love.”
“We’re not sure. I have a pregnancy test…”
“I’m sure, but take the test if you wish.”
Helping me up, I open the cabinet and pick up the pregnancy test. After I read the instructions, I sit down and pee on the stick.
My husband hasn’t moved from the spot, posted like a sentinel by my side. The man who would protect me at the cost of his life. The man who makes all my whims a reality.
I sit the stick on the toilet lid and wash my hands.
“And now, we wait,” I say, finding his steady reflection in the mirror.
He wraps his arms around my belly, placing his chin on my shoulder, his eyes softening and his features drawn in delight. “I know when I got you pregnant. You’ve been showing signs,mo run, even if you didn’t realize. I simply sped up the process by fucking you even more during your fertile window.”
A peal of laughter escapes me. I’ve been taking my pills on and off, and on our last vacation, I completely forgot them. I never thought it would happen this fast, but I guess he has some super sperm my egg was keen to suck in.
A smug expression plasters on his face. “And I can tell I got my wife pregnant on the first try.”
I shake my head at him. “Keep bragging, baby. I’ll remind you when you wake up in the middle of the night to change diapers.”
I am about to peek at the result, the suspense killing me, when he turns me around and palms my face, rubbing his nose against mine. “I know the result. You know the result. We’re going to be parents. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for giving me more than a home, but now you’re giving me a legacy,mo run. I will do my best. I will love our child with everything in me. Protect and cherish it, but nothing will ever diminish my love for you. In this world, the only one I truly need is you.”
He places a palm on my belly as I fight with tears, the honesty behind his declaration of love reverberating through me, making my insides hum an endless tune of love for him. “I love the life we created, but what I feel for you is incomparable. My heart just expands to love our baby, but it’s entirely yours. You’re my home. The one I will die needing.”
Lifting myself onto my toes, I palm his cheek and he leans into my touch, placing a tender kiss on the inside of my hand.
I forget about the stick. I forget about everything else as I press my mouth to his and kiss him, pouring every wondrous feeling, a love that has no beginning and no end, all my hopes and dreams.
“I am scared.”
“Don’t be,mo run. Together.”
