I knew she hated hospitals. We had that in common, but she needed to understand this was bigger than her. It was bigger than all of us put together. I didn’t know what to say or do without making it worse. There was no causing her any more stress. We’d already done enough.
If she had lost the baby, it would have been our fault, and that was a ticking time bomb ready to explode at any second.
The only thing I could do was call her out. “You think this is about control? You think I give a shit about control right now?”
“Yes,” she exclaimed without hesitation. “I think that’s all you care about.”
She wasn’t entirely wrong, but she wasn’t entirely right either.
“It’s about you,” I stated, stepping closer to her despite myself. I ignored the way Julius’s entire body went still, just waiting for an excuse to intervene. “It’s about the fact that you scared the hell out of us tonight.”
I used the word “us” before I realized I’d said it. Her expression flickered, noticing I did as well. Just for a moment, I could see it, and I continued to push.
“I walked in here thinking…” I stopped, not wanting to admit this, but everyone needed to hear it.
Especially Julius.
“I thought we lost you. If you lost the baby, I don’t think you would have?—”
“Forgiven you?”
I simply nodded. “There’s no coming back from that, Kitty.”
The room went quiet again as silence took over. Julius shifted slightly. He knew exactly what I meant, and he hated that.
We were all unraveling in our own ways.
I could see it happening in real time, feeling the tension building to the point of no return. It was stretched to the max, ready to snap at any second. I should have reined it in, but it was no longer unavoidable.
We couldn’t continue like this. It wasn’t good for her or the baby. I stood there, waiting for answers from the doctor as they poked and prodded her. Watching Julius’s face as he took in the baby for the first time when they were doing the ultrasound.
My brother was always hard to read. However, he wasn’t hiding a damn thing tonight. All his emotions were on his face, and he wore them proudly. The truth of the matter was, he loved the baby as much as I did. Making me think maybe it was his, or could he love my baby just as much…?
I didn’t feel relief—there was fear, anger, and something darker that I didn’t know how to name. It was the three of us. He stood by her side with as much right as I had. Almost like we were equals in this sordid love affair we couldn’t escape.
The problem was, how did we make it right for all of us?
How do we both get her without losing each other?
Julius broke through my tormented thoughts, announcing out of nowhere, “This ends tonight.”
Our eyes shifted over to him as he declared, “Things can’t keep going the way they have been. Can we all agree on that at least?”
We locked gazes for a second, aware he was right.
“Yeah, that’s what I thought.”
Isla coaxed, “I can’t lose you, Julius. Any more than I can lose Kraven.”
“I know,” he muttered in a low tone. “It’s why I paid the extra money to have the test results back in twenty-four hours.”
I sucked in a breath.
“We should get them back any minute, and I didn’t want you to be surprised. Trust me, the last thing I want to do is upset you or stress you out again, Isla, but the longer we postpone the inevitable, the worse it’s going to be. You heard the doctor—no stress, so this ends tonight.”
Isla’s stare went wide. “What does that mean?”
Someone had to pull the trigger, and since I was the one who brought the gun, shoving the paternity test in Julius’s chest at the house, I guess it only made sense he’d actually use it. He was right. We did need to know the truth once and for all.
