He steps closer, his eyes trained on me. “Hi.”
I swallow hard. “Hi.”
“Hi,” Jemmy interjects, waving a hand in Joshua’s direction.
“Hey, Jemmy.” Joshua shifts toward him. “High five?”
He slaps his palm against Joshua’s with dramatic enthusiasm.
“Wow,” Joshua says, shaking his hand, feigning pain. “You’re getting strong.”
A week ago, I would have swooned at how great Joshua is with little Jemmy.
That was before I knew what it was like to be wrapped up in Hayden’s arms. Before I knew exactly how his body felt against mine. Before I knew what kind of inferno his touch could ignite inside me.
Joshua turns his attention back to me now that Jemmy seems pre-occupied with listing off the produce once more. “I had a lot of fun Saturday.”
“I did, too.”
It’s not a complete lie. I did enjoy my time with Joshua.
It was easy. Comfortable. Safe. But it was forgettable.
“What are you doing this Saturday night? Are you free?”
My expression immediately falls.
While Hayden and I aren’t exactly in a relationship, I still don’t feel right stringing Joshua along. Like I’ve repeatedly said… Life’s too short to waste on mediocrity. And Joshua doesn’t make my heart race.
Not like Hayden.
“Listen, Joshua…,” I begin.
“That doesn’t sound good,” he says with a self-deprecating laugh.
“I’m sorry.” I wince, worrying my bottom lip.
I’ve always hated breakups.
It’s probably why I never broke up with Landon when I wanted to. When every voice in my head told me he wasn’t the right man for me. That I deserved someone who’d scale mountains to be with me. Who wouldn’t cut bait at the first sign of trouble.
“I really like you. And I had fun. But I don’t think it’s fair to keep going out with you.”
“You’re friend-zoning me,” he says gently.
“I guess I am. Maybe if things were different…” I shake my head, pushing away the thought. “But the truth is I only agreed to go out with you because I was trying to…forget about someone else.”
He studies my face carefully. Not defensive. Not angry. Just…curious.
“Did it work?”
I slowly shake my head.
Not even close.
If anything, going out with him made the truth I’d been fighting crystal clear.
“Me neither,” Joshua admits on a long exhale.
