“Claire?” My heart races at just the sound of her name.
He nods. “Her father walked out. Left her mother when she was pregnant with her. For the longest time, she blamed herself.”
I nod, remembering her mentioning as much after I told her about my own father.
“She’s gone all her life never asking anyone for more because she’s worried about losing them,” Joshua explains. “She’s always put everyone else’s needs before her own because she’s worried if she doesn’t, they’ll leave her like her father did. So, the fact that she overcame her fear and askedyoufor more, put her heart on the line for you? That’s huge. And you, the man who claims to care about her, you ran. Because you’re a fucking coward.”
The truth detonates inside me. My breath comes ragged, my face heating. I knew her father left. But I never realized how deep it went.
Claire, who has spent her whole life terrified of being left, offered me her heart. Overcame her fears for me. And I left her anyway. Just like her father.
“Fuck,” I whisper, my voice breaking.
“I’m not going to sit here and tell you I can understand your thought process. I was raised by an amazing woman who made me feel loved every single day. I don’t know what it’s like to growup with someone who made you feel worthless. But I do know this…” He looks at me, unflinching.
“You’re not that man. I’ve seen who you are these past weeks. You stayed in Sycamore Falls just so I wouldn’t have to spend my first Christmas without my mom alone. Whether you want to admit it or not, that’s what love is.”
The words strike deeper than a punch. My chest feels tight.Tootight.
I didn’t think I was capable of love. Didn’t think I was deserving of being loved.
But if Claire’s willing to overcome her fear, can’t I do the same?
“So fuck what your father made you believe,” Joshua continues. “Stop letting him control your life. If you want Claire, go after her. Prove you’re different. That you’re not the man your father made you think you are. But if you hurt her again?” His mouth hardens. “I’ll make sure you regret it.”
A small chuckle falls from my throat as I look upon my son with something that feels an awful lot like pride.
“I hope your mother realized what an amazing young man she raised before she passed.”
“She knew.”
I peer into his eyes, seeing pieces of myself in him. A part of me wonders how he would have turned out if things had been different. If I’d given his mother my number and she’d reached out about the pregnancy. I can’t help but think he was better off without me. Or is that just my father speaking?
“What the hell do I do?” I rake a hand through my hair. “I was awful to her.”
“Grovel,” he answers without hesitation. “And when you think you’ve groveled enough?” His grin sharpens. “Grovel more.”
I lean back against the couch, the weight of his words settling in. For the first time since I watched Claire walk away, something sparks in my chest. Not certainty, but possibility.
Claire may slam the door in my face, and I wouldn’t blame her.
But she took a risk on me.
It’s my turn to take a risk on her.
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
CLAIRE
Silver and goldstreamers shimmer from the rafters of the Holley Ridge barn, glinting under the twinkle of thousands of fairy lights. A band plays an upbeat jazz tune, couples spinning in a blur of sequins and champagne, the room alive with celebration.
Laughter blends with the clinking of glasses, the energy and excitement growing more and more electric as the clock hanging over the bar ticks down to midnight.
And yet, all I can think about is him.
I’ve spent most of the night near the edge of the dance floor, pretending to enjoy myself while my gaze keeps drifting toward the doors. A ridiculous part of me can’t help but hope that Declan will show up. That maybe I’ll get that same climactic ending like in books and movies, and Declan will rush in at the last second like Harry did for Sally.
But the clock keeps ticking. And there’s no sign of Declan.
