During a slower part of the choreo, I scan the theater.
There’s Liam—at the front of the upper deck. I look up at him and smile. He catches my eye and smiles back. Half of me wants to beangry with him for disappearing again, but the other half is glad to see him anyway.
Margaret is sitting upright as usual, hands folded in her lap. When she sees me, she smiles and holds up a sign that readsI love you Naomi.I nod and hope she knows how much it means to me that she’s here.
I scan the crowd again, running my eyes past every face. They’re into the performance. Some are clapping, others hollering for their friends, and it feels good seeing so many different faces in the crowd.
But my heart sinks as I realize the one person missing…Maya.
—
I dance fourmore pieces over the next three hours. It’s the best I’ve ever performed.
In the dressing room, Zee comes up to me and slaps me on the back. “Hey, good work out there. You killed it.”
I force myself to look at her. She’s smiling big, clearly stoked with how the show went.
“Thanks. Your choreo was dope. I’m sad it’s over.”
“Me too.” She pours some champagne into a paper cup. Hands it to me. “Hey, I might go to a Sterling alum’s birthday in the city later if you want to come. It’s gonna be lit. They rented out a restaurant in the Village with a massive rooftop. DJ. Open bar…”
—
After Zee leaves,I sit on a stool in the changing room, staring blankly at my reflection. After the show, Liam had finally texted me back:I’m sorry, the past couple of weeks were hell. I promise I’ll explain if you let me.I’d been sitting here when I got that text, all the dancers bubbling around me about the show, gathering their things. They’d since filtered out to the after-party, leaving behind flower petals, glitter, feathers, forgotten earrings.
I blink, and my reflection blinks back. She’s confident…smart…so what is wrong with me? Why don’t I feel whole?
“Naomi.” Liam’s voice makes me look up. He’s standing in the doorway holding a bouquet of blush-colored roses, and all the anger I’d saved up for him vanishes.
I smile, playfully. “Liam Alexander the Third buysflowers?”
“Yeah, yeah. Don’t get used to it.”
I stand and give him a hug. “Thanks for coming.”
He hands me the flowers and studies my face, sensing my sadness. “What’s wrong?”
“My sister was supposed to come, but she’s not here.” My sister had been more distant than Liam. Maybe she’s the one I should be upset with. I set the flowers down on the table and pour myself a glass of champagne. “Want one?”
Liam shakes his head. “You hungry? Want to get dinner?”
I shrug. I don’t feel like eating. “Zee said there’s a birthday party for one of the Sterling alums in the city, I think I might go.”
“I heard about that. But do you really want to go into the city tonight? It’ll take us at least a couple hours.”
I grin. “Not on a motorcycle.”
—
Riding on theback of Liam’s motorcycle is exhilarating. My body is pressed against his, heart racing and eyes squeezed shut as we weave in and out of traffic.
“You okay back there?” Liam shouts above the wind.
“Yeah,” I reply, pretending not to be as scared as I am. I’m holding on to Liam’s waist, my eyes closed behind the helmet visor. I’ve only been on his motorcycle once—the night he’d found me at Lake Carnegie and gave me a ride back to the dorms—and we’d gone twenty miles an hour on a residential street. This…is very different.
“What?”
I open my eyes to an overwhelming blur of red and white lights streaking past, cool air and diesel exhaust in my nostrils. We’re soaring, my blood pumping with adrenaline, my fingers numb from gripping onto him so tight. “I said,yeah, I’m good!”
