She wavered a fraction and then her jaw tightened. “Just tell me, won’t you?”
“This morning I was called to my grandfather’s home to discuss what happened in the countryside.”
“To gloat over what you all did?” she said. “Is that what you mean? Did he send you here as his lackey again to see if I’m suffering? Please report back that I’m fine and the lot of you can hang.” She gave a falsely bright smile.
“I will gladly do so if I bother to ever speak to him again,” he said, and there was a zing of heart ache that worked through him at the idea that he might walk away at last from his father’s family. He’d been so entangled in them for so long.
Her brow knitted. “What does that mean? Are you well?”
The question and the earnestness with which it was asked threw him off guard. She leaned forward a fraction in her seat and was searching his face as if she could find…God, who knew what. He hoped something worthwhile. He hadn’t felt much of that as of late.
“I’m…tolerable, thank you.” He sighed. “But this isn’t about me. He told me something troubling about—about you, and I thought you should know it.”
Her lips parted then and all the desire and bluster bled away from her expression. What was left was fear. A fear he realized had always been there, only controlled and hidden. But of course it would be. A woman in her position would always be standing on shaky ground, ready to jump to the next pillar that looked solid.
It was why she’d so wanted the stability his bastard of a cousin had lied to her about.
“Tell me,” she said, her voice cracking a fraction.
“When Laurence so cruelly ended things with you, he mentioned a lady, another bride.”
Color entered her cheeks, but she nodded. “Yes. Trust that I recall every detail of that final conversation. What about it?”
“You met her. It’s Miss Garrington.”
“The little daughter of that boring steward?” Julia burst out. “The one who could only hold a conversation about the weather?That’swho he threw me over for?”
“I’m sorry. Yes. Grandfather initially didn’t approve the match, given that she is the daughter of only a country gentleman rather than a lord.”
Her mouth tightened. “I see. He picked someone far less savory as a comparison, as a threat of what he could do if denied his true desire.”
Tears sparkled in her eyes as she said the words. There was pain there, but he thought it was the pain of humiliation and regret, rather than loss. Alexander didn’t think she’d ever loved Laurence, and somehow that was a comfort. At least her heart wasn’t broken, merely her pride and spirit that were bruised. Not that those were small things.
“Yes. Please, I take no pleasure in revisiting this, I promise you. And I know that my promises mean little to you considering, but I mean them.” He got up and paced away, smoothing his hands over his jacket restlessly.
“Alexander.” He stopped pacing and looked at her. Her hands were now folded in her lap, her gaze unwavering on his face. “Tell me the rest.”
“My cousin forced his hand and my grandfather has relented, so they will marry. I assume it will happen swiftly because of whatever scandal may linger over your engagement and then the end of it. The earl wishes to reduce that and immediacy will do some of the work. Butyouare still out in the world. People knowyou and even more know you after this engagement. So he told me he wishes to—to?—”
Her eyes grew wide as understanding dawned. “Are you saying he plans to do something to me?”
“It seems that might be so.” Alexander bent his head. “To have you come back out as a courtesan after being the intended of Lord Castleton, one day to be Earl of Heathfield…that is too much. He wants you gone.”
“Gone?” she repeated, the color leaving her cheeks. “Gone…how?”
He hesitated. “Given his past, I would assume he’ll go the route of threats if he sees you mounting a return to your life as a courtesan. He would likely try to force you out into the country…at best. But I cannot promise you that he might not go further. He’s been violent in the past, but kept it within the family.”
Her expression softened a little. “I-I’m sorry. I know how awful that can be.”
For a moment they were both silent, bonded by the suffering of their pasts. Then he shifted. “I know you think little of me. You have no other reason but to do so. I want you to know that I refused to be part of any of his plans. Ever again.”
She got up then. “Whatever else I think of you, I wouldn’t believe you’d ever hurt me physically. I do admit I’m surprised to hear you refused him all assistance of any kind. After what happened before.”
“One of the greatest regrets of my life. Something I’ll never repeat,” he said softly.
He could hardly breathe looking at her as she was now, right at the edge of broken, fully realizing what a mistake she had made on every level. Every lovely line of her trembled, those emotions she had somehow managed to rein in were all at the surface. How he wished he could ease them, even if it wasn’t hisplace, no matter what kind of passionate night they had shared and she wished to forget.
“I appreciate the warning,” she said. “I’ll have to consider what you’ve said, as long as you don’t think he would strike immediately?”
