You said it, my heart whispered.
No, I didn’t… I didn’t…
But I couldn’t fight it anymore.
Yes, I love her.
What more pain could be brought anyhow? These last days were spent silencing my heart, but that didn’t do any good. Because I fell in love with Hesper Altanfall, nonetheless.
And maybe, just maybe, I needed to stop hating myself for still being able to love. Maybe I needed to stop thinking it was such a bad thing to let my heart open. Maybe it was the bravest thing a person could do.
This garden wouldn’t bloom. And if I didn’t let my heart reach—even if it might fail—I would never bloom, either.
My heart broke wide open, the last bits of walls, rails, and thorns giving way forever.
Where I’d expected pain, there was only warmth and gratefulness as emotions poured through me.
I was grateful to love. And one day, I would be loved in return.
Until then, I had myself. And that?
That was enough.
More than enough, my heart sang happily, the magic in my chest churning.
I felt it then, like a taut string connecting two people across a long distance.
My magic and me.
You’re my magic, aren’t you? Not just my heart?
Indeed, my heart magic said.
Of course. It only made sense. All these barricades around my heart, all this stopping up of my love for Hesper—it was blocking my ability to channel my magic. But now, the connection was crystal clear.
Grow, I said to my magic.
Bloom, I told my heart.
There was a deep tremor in the earth just as another clap of thunder roared above. Even through the rain, I could see a tiny flower crop up by my boot—sunshine yellow and blooming. Then, frantic footfalls rang out through the downfall.
“Clara!” Hesper screamed, appearing in front of me. Her face was tight with worry, teardrops mingled with rain sluicing down her face.
“It’s you!” I yelled through the deafening rain.
“What?” she screamed back.
“You were my block. It was you all along.” Her eyebrows knit together in confusion.
“I love you, Hesper,” I said proudly, even though my voice was ragged and cracking; her face went slack. “I love you like I have never loved anyone before. I have been at war with my heart this entire quest, trying not to love you. This garden couldn’t grow because I was not letting myself love you as I longed to. I don’t want to fight it. I’ve finally let go.” Tears poured down my face; lightning struck above. “I don’t need you to say anything back. I just need you to know that I love you, and I will keep loving you even as you turn to go.”
I tried to leave then, tried to run through the garden gate. I loved her, yes, but I couldn’t bear looking at her face for another second.
“Do not run away from me, Clara Thorne,” Hesper’s voice cracked through the wind, but I kept running. “Please.” The pain in her voice rooted me to the ground, my back still facing her.
“I want you now,” she shouted. “I want you forever.” I turned to face her then. “I have spent every waking hour trying to figure out how to get out of this bargain with Eldrene so that I can stay with you. I would break Haven’s gates open, ransack the golden halls of our Gods and Goddesses, and bring down every last one of them if it meant that I could spend even a day longer with you. So please, don’t run out in this fucking storm and make me chase you. Because I will. I will follow you to the ends of the earth and back again. Because I love you, damn it. I do.”
I ran to her. She ran toward me.
