But don’t say I didn’t warn you.
Olive
“So much for ‘No way he’ll be coming’!”I hiss as I slip through the door after Tori, and the first person I see in the old greenhouse is Colin Fantino.To be fair to her, I have to say that Tori seems genuinely surprised, so at least it looks like she really didn’t know he’d be here.Atourmidnight party, even though I bet he thinks he’s too cool for us.
“Hmm.Charlie said...”Tori’s pulling her phone from her jacket pocket.Before she even has a chance to look at it, Sinclair’s appeared in front of us.
“Hey, sorry, I did text you.”He glances at me and gestures at Fantino.“For some reason he actually wanted to come when I asked him.”
I must have misheard.“Seriously, you invited him?”
“Yeah, you’ve got to be polite.”
“Why would you be polite to him?”
“Olive, he’s new, and I’m sharing a room with him,” Sinclair says patiently.“It would be pretty shitty of me not to ask, wouldn’t it?”
“That’s a matter of opinion,” I mutter, but he’s got a point.Somewhere deep down, I’m in favor of being nice to people.But Fantino’s taken the piss once too often.
“Just stick with us.”Tori shoves me past a few lower-sixth people to the back of the greenhouse, where I see Emma and Henry and the rest of my friends.Just as well because I’m really not in the mood to chat to Theresa about how the school newspaper is coming along.Although she’s with Elain, and I’d like to ask her how she’s settling in, but, well, I’ve got other problems.
I fight down the urge to make a scene by flouncing out.I’m not going to let Colin Fantino mess up this evening with my friends.But I find it harder than I expected to ignore him while the others chat and laugh.Especially once I notice that Colin’s not exactly holding back on the drink.I’ve seen enough Insta stories and TikToks of him with his cool New York pals to be sure that, in the States, he was used to partying at a whole different level from what we can manage here at school, but I still don’t like it.He might be used to it, but that doesn’t change how much trouble we’ll be in if a teacher finds us boozing.It’s an open secret thatthey turn a blind eye to the midnight parties so long as we don’t push it too far.And binge drinking is definitely pushing it.
But if Fantino wants to take his chances, let him.It’s not my problem.Quite the opposite—maybe then he’d get himself expelled.Which is what everybody wants.
I notice that Grace isn’t here.I text to ask if she’s coming, and she says she’s too tired.I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s no sign of Gideon here either.The other day, I asked Grace how she’d got on at the sick bay after training, and she snapped that Nurse Petra said she was in perfect health.I really don’t know what to do about Grace.But even if she were here, I probably wouldn’t feel any better.I don’t fit in anymore.Not like I did before the summer.I can’t deny that, when Tori, Sinclair, and everyone burst out laughing over something I wasn’t there for.Stuff in class, new in-jokes—sure, they explain them, but it’s not the same.It’ll never be the same again, even if I get to rejoin them.
The thought comes like an unexpected blow as I sit, knees drawn up, on the worn-out carpet and listen to their plans for after their A levels in the summer.I can’t shut my eyes to it anymore.Grace is talking to Gideon, not me.Tori has eyes only for Sinclair, and as for Emma and Henry, well, let’s just not go there.
I ignore Tori’s brief side-eye as I reach for the wine bottle that Sinclair just opened.I never drank alcohol while I was training for a meet, but there’s nothing to prepare for now.Apart from the moment when my friends leave Dunbridge and I’m really alone.
The first few swigs taste minging, but after a while I get used to it.When the bottle is half empty, I look up and find Fantino’s eyes on me.
I narrow my eyes to slits and lift it to my lips again, and he follows suit with his.Apparently, he thinks drinking constantly makes him extra adult and cool.Surprise: I can do that too.And with a bit of luck, I’ll have a couple of hours where I can forget that I’m now just as bad as my mum.
An unpleasant chill spreads through me, and it gets harder to smile as Tori and Sinclair eventually piss off.They’re not the only ones—the old greenhouse has emptied out, and I don’t think it’ll be long before the last stragglers want their beds.Henry looks as if he could fall asleep on the spot.He seems relieved when Emma looks inquiringly over to him and points to the door.
“You staying?”Emma asks as they stand up.
“Think so,” I mutter, forcing myself to smile.“Sleep well.”
“You too, Olive.”
It’s not like I’m not tired.The idea of lying in bed is tempting, but I know it’s a long way from reality.And I want to spend a while longer acting like the fear of the nights isn’t shaping my everyday life.Maybe I’ll be in luck and actually get to sleep tonight if I keep drinking a wee bit longer.Although the slight dizziness and sick feeling are maybe signs that I should stop.
I can’t help my eyes automatically looking for Fantino once Emma and Henry have left the greenhouse.I don’t see him among the lower sixth.Did he leave without me noticing?What the hell?We didn’t even fight.And somehow it doesn’t feel so good not to be able to see him anymore.Although objectively speaking, it’s fabulous.Yes, it’s fantastic.Amazing.He’s finally gone, and that’s what I’ve been wanting all along.
“That’s enough.”
I jump as someone takes the almost-empty bottle from me.Turning my head makes me feel kind of sick, but I try not to let that show.Fantino’s face comes into focus above me, his expression grim.Ha.He has no right to order me around.
“Who do you think you are?”I snarl, but my tongue won’t obey me.I reach for the bottle, but Colin just holds on to it.Bawbag.
“You’ve had enough.”
“And who are you to decide that?”
He glares warningly at me.“Go sleep it off, Olive Garden.”
