Aurelia’s eyebrows raise. “Why?”
“To practice.”
Aurelia’s eyes dart toward the tent flap. Her fingers twitch at her sides, and she shifts her weight to the balls of her feet as if she’s thinking about running. She doesn’t. Just as she kept showing up every day to master the sword, she meets my eyes and her throat bobs with a swallow, then she crosses the remaining distance and sits down on my lap. I suck in a breath.
I was expecting her to sit across from me, but she must have thought I had something else in mind. Still, thinking of her request that I not “push her away,” I say nothing as I pull her closer.
Aurelia shifts so she’s sitting sideways on my lap, her legs flung over my thigh. She wraps one arm around my neck and angles inward so we can stare directly at each other. She looks completely neutral, but I can hear her heart beating, and it’s going just as fast as mine.
“Ready?” she asks.
I give a grunt of agreement that sounds a little too close to a no. I don’t know what I want to do right now. Everything is all jumbled up in my head.
She just stares at me, our gazes locked. She doesn’t laugh, but after a few seconds I see her eyes drift out of focus.
“Try thinking about what you’re pretending to say,” I tell her. She shakes her head and blinks to bring her gaze back into focus, and tries again. This time she looks more engaged. “Better.”
“You’re not doing anything, though.”
“What?”
“You’re just watching me. You don’t look like we’re talking about anything.”
I blink. Somehow I hadn’t realized I’d have to pretend too. “Go again.”
Aurelia widens her eyes slightly, and even though I have no idea what she thinks we’re talking about, I pretend to answer in my head as if I do. “Yes, it’s nice out tonight. Not too cold.”
She quirks an eyebrow, and this time I imagine her saying:“Do you really think I would talk about something so boring as the weather?”
“No,”I pretend to answer.“You’re a lot of things, witch, but never boring.”
She tilts her head as if asking a question, and I nod, pretending to answer,“Yes.”
She smiles, and I don’t mean to but I smile back.
“—Ooh, a dimple smile. I’m honored.”
I blink, startled. That time, the pretending was so good it was as if I could really hear her.
Tentatively, I think.“Aurelia?”
I wait, but Aurelia’s voice remains silent and she doesn’t react, except by tilting her head as if she’s still pretending to listen.
I let out a breath. Of course, I didn’t actually hear her. I’m losing my fucking mind.
That night, dinner goes as well as I could expect. We reenact the scene from the tent for half the meal, and Kai talks at us for the rest, giving Aurelia an easy excuse to speak out loud.
Unfortunately, the second night is somehow worse than the first.
Just because Aurelia and I can’t be together doesn’t mean I want her any less, and sleeping next to each other is torture. The scent of her—pine needles and something sweet and fruity—fills my lungs with every careful breath.
I’m almost expecting it when I wake up the following morning with my cock straining painfully against my trousers. Aurelia’s long, dark hair is tickling my nose, and her back is pressed against my chest, her ass nestled perfectly against myhips. I lie there, frozen, afraid to move and wake her; afraid to stay, and lose what little control I have left.
Choosing the easier option, I hold my breath and ease away from her body. The furs crinkle. She stirs. I freeze until her breathing steadies, then slip to the edge of our bed. Cold air hits my skin as I leave her warmth behind.
Without bothering to put my boots on, I stride out of the tent and through the silent camp. On the outskirts of the rows of tents, I shift again and go for a run until I can think straight.
When I return to the tent to get dressed, I’m too preoccupied to consider that she could be awake. I duck under the tent flap and step inside. Aurelia shrieks and whirls around, holding a crumpled dress up to her naked chest to cover her breasts.
