She shook her head. “It’s personal. It may be that my head’s not in the right place. It’s just...I shouldn’t be here. Out there. I shouldn’t be fighting fires. People will get hurt.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Neither do I, sir.” Her voice cracked, and she willed herself not to cry. She had wanted nothing more than to be a firefighter. She wanted to save lives, change people’s futures for the better, but clearly it was more than she could handle. “I can’t do the job. Thank you for everything. I’m sorry.” With that, she left without waiting to be dismissed.
She walked out to find Ambrose and Schultz standing outside the captain’s office, turnout gear off but still grimy from the fire. They looked at each other as Riya came toward them, concern on their faces.
“What’s going on, Desai?” Ambrose spoke as gently as he ever had.
She met the lieutenant’s gaze. “I turned in my badge.” Interesting how easy it was to say difficult things if you distanced yourself from them.
Ambrose narrowed his eyes at her, his jaw clenched. “Running, are you?”
“Call it whatever you want.” She shrugged; the fight was out of her. “It’s for the best, trust me.” She started to walk away.
“People get hurt in fires, Desai,” Ambrose called after her. “You deal with it.”
“You’re right. People get hurt in fires.” She turned back to him, her heart pounding. “But they shouldn’t get hurt by the people they trust to keep them safe. I’m a firefighter, and I let someone I love get hurt. If you hadn’t been there...” Her voice broke again. “Not going to happen again.”
She turned all the way to face her lieutenant, walking back to him. “And if you care about Hetal—” Riya tilted her chin up to look him in the eye “—you’ll rip up her application when it comes your way.”
If the anger Dhillon had shown when Hetal had sprained her ankle as a child was any indication, he would never forgive her for this.
Just as well. She’d never forgive herself.
thirty-three
DHILLON
Dhillon had returned from the dance, slightly giddy from finally having kissed Riya. He’d been wanting to for so long, but he hadn’t thought she felt the same way. But she did! He was nearly floating. His parents had just got his little sister to bed and were enjoying a rare few moments of quiet when he had walked in.
“Someone looks like they had a great time.” His father had chuckled.
Dhillon shrugged, trying for nonchalance. “It was okay.”
His parents had shared a look and a small grin that Dhillon didn’t understand. But they were always looking at each other and smiling. It was just part of their relationship, so he didn’t pay them much mind.
Lucky had bounded to greet him as if he’d been gone for a month instead of a few hours. Dhillon had got on the floor to play with him.
“Can you take Lucky out before you go to bed?”
“Sure, Papa.” Dhillon had leashed Lucky and taken him out. He had considered knocking on Riya’s door to see her again, but it was late, and he didn’t want her to get in trouble. When he returned, his parents had fallen asleep on the sofa. He woke them, and the three of them went upstairs together.
Dhillon had fallen into blissful sleep, Lucky defiantly curled up next to him on the bed. He dreamed about kissing Riya. Wondered if she might want to be his girlfriend.
He was awakened by his father’s urgent shouts. “Dhillon! Dhillon!”
Dhillon jumped out of bed to smoke and heat. He hurried out into the hallway and found his parents outside his sister’s room. His father thrust a screaming Hetal into his arms.
“Take her. Go with your mother and get outside. Keep them safe. I’ll be right behind you.”
Lucky was barking.
“Take Lucky with you.”
Dhillon held on to his sister and called for Lucky to follow. His mother was at the stairs. “Dhillon!” She grabbed Hetal from him.
He did as he was told, as smoke and flames raged around them. He followed his mother down the stairs, out the door and across the street, assuming that his father and Lucky were behind him.
