“Huh.”
“Disappointed?”
I shook my head. If anything, it sounded like he used his postgraduation time to better himself. But somewhere inside, I was trying to extinguish a flicker of jealousy over this girl he mentioned. “I dunno, guess I sort of imagined you doing wild things up north, like meeting someone in boot camp and Bonny and Clyde–ing your way across the country. Not... adopting dogs. Are you still in touch with this... what did you say her name was?”
“Kaylee? God no.”
“No Bonny and Clyde–ing with her, then, I guess.”
“Kaylee and I weren’t friends. Pretty sure she couldn’t stand me, and to be honest, the feeling was mutual. Our relationship in boot camp only consisted of getting each other off to pass the time.”
I turned up my nose. “Gee, romantic.”
“Hey, she felt the same way about me.”
Andthatwas supposed to make me feel better? “You frequently have hate-sex with people you can’t stand?”
“Only when the people I like are busy.”
He was joking, but knowing this did nothing to assuage the petty jealousy that continued to prick at my heart. I frowned. “Why do you say stuff like that?”
“Like what? The truth?”
“Ugh, whatever.” A little worry joined my jealousy. What if he wasn’t being crass for “the likes?” Maybe this was just his overall attitude toward sex. Jokes, put-downs, casual apathy. I couldn’t reconcile this with the memory of how he’d made me feel on the roof when his arms were wrapped around me.
“Still waiting for your witty retort, Malone.”
“Don’t have one. Too busy kicking myself for letting you kiss me.”
The air between us changed immediately. Seb’s head swiveled in my direction, and his sharp gaze fixed on mine, a defensive electricity crackling behind his eyes.
“You kissed me back!” he argued.
“And, what? You were just bored, like you were with this Kaylee girl?”
“I was not bored, and neither were you.”
I felt my cheeks heat but couldn’t do anything about it. I just knew that I’d made a huge faux pas, bringing up the kiss. I wasn’t ready to talk about it with Seb. Best to try to steer the conversation into other pastures. “I guess our high school experiences were a little different, that’s all.”
“Right, sure. While I was up north, trying to make it out of boot camp without losing my mind, you were bumping uglies with Little Lord Fauntleroy at prom.”
My stomach tightened. “How the hell do you know about me and Henry?”
It took him a moment to admit, “Benny. Guess your prom date kissed and told. I mean, you and Henry were the only two in the class to end up at Ivy Leagues, so you were both meant to be, I suppose.”
I didn’t know where to place my anger. At Benny, for talking about my love life behind my back? Or at Henry for telling everyone? “It was not ‘meant to be.’ It was a one-time thing—I haven’t even seen Henry since graduation.”
“You’re in the hot seat, too, you know,” he sat, patting the swing’s cushion. “I told you my shame. You next.”
“There’s nothing to tell. I went to prom with Henry; it seemedlike a good-enough time to lose my virginity, so I did. It wasn’t great, wasn’t a nightmare. It just... was.” I shrugged as casually as I could. Though, now that I was thinking about it, Henry and I didn’t really speak after that, so maybe the experience was worse than I remembered.
He snorted softly. “Leave it to you to calculate the right time to lose your virginity.”
“Well, I wasn’t going to wait until college...” What did he want me to say? “I literally could not think of Henry less. And why are you judging my decisions?”
“You judged mine.”
“I...”
