Aglow in the light of the moon.
It hums a sad little tune.
“I’m going to eat you all up,”
It says while rubbing its gut.
“I’ll soon turn you into a pulp,
Eat you up in one big gulp.”
The eyes are moving towards me,
I’m trapped and there’s no way to flee,
No saviour to come break me free.
I blurt out one final plea.
“Please spare me, my heart is true,
And we can be friends, me and you.”
But its terrible smile only grew.
“Little girl, this is what monsters do.”
CHAPTER 46
NATHAN
“Nathan, babe, how long are you staying with Faye?” Jessica’s voice is muffled through the car speaker. I turn the volume up another bar before answering.
“Maybe for one more night. I’m not sure.” Then I laugh and add, “Gotta get in the old stepmother’s good graces to inherit that house.”
Jessica doesn’t answer right away. But when she does, her voice is measured and calm. “Nathan, you can’t carry this guilt for the rest of your life.”
Sometimes I can’t stand that Jess sees right through me, as she has just now. She’s the only person I’ve told the whole truth to. Not even Faye herself has told anyone else what happened that day. But Jess knows, and Jess loves me anyway. Not that I deserve it.
I’m a brat. Dad could be strict at times, but after Mum died he ended up spoiling me, hoping it would fix everything. But it taught me that I could get my own way, that I could get anything I wanted. And the thing I wanted more than anything in the world was for Faye to disappear and for my mum to come back.
I’ve replayed the day it happened again and again in my mind. She’d been married to dad for about three years by then. Penny was two – I could never hate that little munchkin as much as I tried to – and Faye was pregnant with her second child. Though I didn’t actually know that as an eight-year-old boy. We were upstairs in the new house in London, and I was screaming at Faye. I don’t know what it was about, but I remember the pure unadulterated rage I felt towards her. I blurted out all the classics: “You’re not my real mum”, “I hate you” with the disco remix of “go to hell”.
It was the first time I’d seen Faye snap. She threw something across the room, and then she stormed out.
It was like an elastic band went off inside me. She wasn’t allowed to lose her temper. Only I could scream and stamp my feet. So, I ran after her and shoved her as hard as I could.
Did I know she was on the top step of the stairs?
Did I know I was going to hurt her?
Or was I simply acting out in the moment?
I’ll never know.
But the part that sticks out in my mind is how I stood there watching her crawl along the hallway.
I didn’t help her.
