“I am well aware,” he said, lowering his eyes, “of how I did this to myself. You need not bury the blade any deeper.” His voice quieted then to something less than a whisper. “But will you promise me something, angel? When you do decide to kill me, will you tell me how you intend to do it?”
“Cyrus—”
“Enough, I beg you.” He shook his head. “I am only a man,Alizeh, I can only withstand so much torture in one day. Please,” he said, his voice breaking on the word. “Leave me. Leave me to what’s left of my godforsaken life.”
She stood there a moment, frozen.
“And tomorrow?” she said quietly. “Who will we become then? Are we to be enemies once more?”
He said nothing, his body trembling almost imperceptibly as he stared at the ground, and when he finally parted his lips to answer, there came a sudden, urgent pounding at the door.
Thirty
CYRUS STIFFENED, BUT HE DIDnot move; neither of them said a word. Alizeh was still staring at his mouth, wishing the world beyond these walls would drop dead just long enough for her to know his answer, but her hopes were soon dashed.
There was another round of relentless pounding at the door, and finally Cyrus closed his eyes and swore, drawing away from her with palpable anguish.
Alizeh stood there, paralyzed in place, her mind spinning, her heart broken. She heard his footfalls as he strode to the entrance, heard the whine of the old wood as he opened the door.
Sarra’s voice was unmistakable.
“Where have you been?” she screamed. “I’ve been searching for you everywhere! Your valet said he’d come up earlier to dress you for dinner but he claimed you weren’t here—and then you never appeared downstairs and neither did the girl, who isn’t in her room, and I had no idea where to evenbeginlooking for you, for the last place I expected you to be so early in the evening was lying unconscious in your bed like some kind of profligate, not until my maid told me she’d heard about the most miserable snoda sobbing her eyes out in the kitchens, fearing for her job after finding you asleep in your chamber—”
“Mother.”
“—and why aren’t you wearing any clothes? Heavens, but you look worse than death—have you been ill? Is that why you were abed at this hour?”
“Yes.”
“Your timing,” she said angrily, “is disastrous. It’s just like you to go and get yourself sick when you’re actually needed, begging off when everyone else has to deal with the fallout of your demented actions—”
Alizeh was astonished.
She knew the grim extent to which Sarra loathed her son, and within the context of the woman’s injured mind Alizeh could indeed understand her emotional conflict, for she rightfully blamed Cyrus for the brutal murder of her husband. Still, even knowing this, it was shocking to hear her hatred animated thus. It was unnatural to listen to a mother berate her son for falling ill, never bothering to ask whether he was okay. There was something so painful about the exchange that it was hard to hear.
“Will you not get to your point?” Cyrus was saying, his voice clipped. “What is it you need from me?”
“I need that girl!” Sarra shrieked. “Where is she? Where is Alizeh? What have you done with her?”
Alizeh felt a sudden spike of alarm.
“What have Idonewith her?” Cyrus laughed, but it sounded angry.
“Don’t take that tone with me, as if I haven’t every reason to doubt you! The girl is not in her rooms! What else am I supposed to think? No one has seen her in hours, no one saveevery Jinn in Tulan,” she added hysterically, “who’ve been arriving in terrifying hordes from every reach of the empire, and who stormed the castle an hour ago—”
Alizeh felt her heart stop.
“What?” Now Cyrus sounded alarmed. “What do you mean? Are they being violent?”
“Yes, they’re being violent!” she cried. “What on earth can you think I mean? There are thousands of them, Cyrus, and they’re threatening to break down the door lest she show herself.”
“I don’t understand,” he said, his urgency escalating. “Why are they angry? I thought they loved her—”
“Then you knew?” she said, overwrought. “You knew who she was? You knew she meant something to them? Oh, Cyrus, how could you?” Sarra sounded truly broken then. “Of all the stupid and terrible things you’ve ever done— You told me she was of royal blood, but you didn’t tell me she wasthis—thismessiah! She’s going to tear apart the empire!”
Alizeh felt dizzy now, her breaths growing only faster, more labored. She couldn’t believe this was happening. More than that, she couldn’t believe, after all these years, that it was happening likethis.
It was a disaster.
