Her throat bobs. Seyoon nods. “Sure, okay. Practice makes perfect.”
She stands on her tiptoes to help with the height difference and kisses me with less hesitation this time. I hum, humiliatingly, but Seyoon seems to like it. She pulls back just long enough to take a breath before I chase after her to steal it.
“Oh,nowyou’re a quick learner,” Seyoon teases against my mouth.
“Not even this will shut you up, huh?”
She giggles into the kiss—and it hits me all at once. I’m kissing Seyoon. I’ve never kissed anyone before, and now I know what her lips taste like and have felt the shape of her laugh. It’s so intense of a thought that my head swims. If it weren’t for the tree I’ve pressed her up against, I might fall over. When did I push her up against the tree?
And then, from camp, we hear our names being called.
“Where are Seyoon and Dean?” Blake says. “We need solo shots of them.”
We jump away from each other, although we’re still well out of sight from the others. My lungs burn like I’ve run a marathon. Her eyes flicker to my mouth area, then she grins, satisfied. There’s no time to question that look before we hurry out into the clearing, acting normal.
“We’re here!” Seyoon chirps. Her voice cracks, and part of me preens.
Blake turns around. She looks between the both of us. Then she sighs.
“Get to hair and makeup first, then come back here. And please, no more fooling around—we’re on a tight schedule,” she says.
Confused, I reach up and touch my mouth. My fingers come away red with Seyoon’s lipstick. I realize why she said we didn’t need the cameras back there.
Blake calls for Siddharth to take his turn, and he skips up. On his way past, he wolf-whistles at us. When I look, Vendredi’s staring, too, her eyebrows arched up. Half a dozen cameras are turned our way.
I turn on my heel and head for the makeup tent, head bowed. Seyoon hurries to catch up.
“No one will be doubting us anymore,” she says around a grin. “That was a hell of a convincing performance, if I say so myself.”
My steps falter slightly. I watch her features closely, looking for any sign that her terrible poker face will slip. None. She smiles plainly at me. As if nothing happened. As if she’s totally unaffected.
I want to kick myself. She said it herself. This isn’t real. I know that. Whatisreal is the finish line we both want to get to: the whole reason we’re even together. Winning is the most important thing to Seyoon. She’s not the type who’d let herself get distracted. Not like me.
This doesn’t mean anything to her, I remind myself. It doesn’t have to mean anything to me either.
I won’t forget why I’m here again.
30
SURELY MY OWN POOR DECISIONS CAN’T BACKFIRE ON ME. NOT IF MY INTENTIONS ARE PURE
SEYOON
On the morning of the fourth challenge, Vendredi walks into the bathroom as I’m blotting the water from my hair after a shower.
“Morning. Where’s your better half?”
I grin, sticking my tongue against the gap in my front teeth. “She just got here.”
“What a flirt. You kiss Dean with that mouth?”
My face turns pink in the mirror. She stabs her finger at my reflection. “Aha!” She wheels around to point at the real me. “So, you guysweremaking out. What is going on with you two?”
“Nothing! We’re teammates. And lovers. Teammates who love each other.”
“I thought you guys were for sure broken up after your huge fight.”
“We made up. You saw.”
