“She knows. Knowing and understanding, however, are different creatures entirely.”
And I realized something about this towering, stoic man. He’d chosen Doria knowingexactlywho and what she was. No illusions, no expectations of change. He saw all of her and still said yes. He didn’t love her despite her mistakes; he loved herthroughthem. This was a man who could scorch stars, unmake constellations, yet he stayed at her side because hechoseto.
“Seri, look at this!” Koa called. “The aetherglass refracts lunar magic in a completely different spectrum!”
As Professor Casimir lectured him about disregarding safety protocols, my eyes flicked to Caelyr. He was staring at Doria now, his expression one of such profound devotion that it made my breath catch.
Thatwas what true love looked like. Not blind adoration or passionate drama, but steady, unwavering commitment. The knowledge that you had seen someone at their worst and their best, at their most broken and their most glorious, and you still chose them. Time and again. Day after day. Lifetime after lifetime.
Maybe that’s what my three husbands saw when they looked at me. Not just who I was now, but who I had been, and all that I might become.
Just like I saw when I looked at them.
15. Worth Holding Onto
Zane
Mum, the Storm Sovereign and terror of the upper realms, talked to my beloved with the gentle care of someone handling a precious treasure. She kept her maternal vibe light and “cool aunt,” but I wasn’t fooled. She wasabsolutelyclocking Seri in every way. Assessing, admiring, testing.
Part of me wanted to rush forward, to interpose myself between them, to shield Seri from whatever game my mother was playing. But another part—a quieter, more honest part—recognized something I’d been trying not to see: Mum wasn’t here to judge or intimidate. She was here because, for the first time in centuries, something had surprised her. Our bond with Seri, our unusual marriage, the witch who had turned three hardened warriors into devoted husbands.
Despite everything, I still wanted my mother to be proud of me. To approve of the family I’d built. To see what I saw in Seri. Not just the power or potential, but the pure, undiluted goodness.
I tugged Brummy toward the back of the library, creating what my therapist would call “a healthy boundary” if I had a therapist, which I didn’t because therapy was for people who wanted to get better. I just wanted to survive the next few hours without my chest imploding.
“C’mere, Brumster.” I rubbed his ears while watching the royal performance unfold across the room. “You and me, buddy. The emotionally stunted duo.”
Brumous tilted his head, blue eyes blinking up at me with that uncanny intelligence that saw right through my bullshit.
Alpha Fun sad?
“No, not sad. Just…” What word would he understand? Conflicted? Emotionally constipated? Catastrophically fucked in the attachment department? “Mixed up.”
My brain was doing that thing again, wanting to be near Mum while my feet carried me in the opposite direction. Like some weird emotional magnet with the polarities all wrong. Push when I should pull. Distance when I craved closeness. Classic me.
Across the library, Seri was talking animatedly about her ward design, and pride bloomed hot and fierce behind my ribs.
Look at her. Look what she’s become. Look who chose me, despite all my jagged edges and bad jokes.
“Remind me why we’re over here again?” I asked Brum-Brum, who responded by flopping onto my foot with a dramatic sigh.
Pack stay, Alpha Fun.He wiggled closer with something like a purr.Lady Storm leaves. Hana stay.
“I know.” I swallowed hard.
As he drifted off, I tossed a stress ball from hand to hand, needing to occupy my fidgety fingers before they betrayed me by doing something stupid like reaching out. Distance was safer. Distance was what I knew. Distance was what Mum had always given me, so I returned the favor.
At least Lucian had been there,my stupid thoughts pointed out. Every. Damn. Day. Whether we wanted him or not, he was there.
That was the irony, wasn’t it? Vampire Daddy Dearest had been more present in my life than the queen currently lighting up my library with her celestial bullshit. Lucian, who’d turned three grief-stricken little boys into weapons. Lucian, who’d backhanded me across the training room for mouthing off during lessons. Lucian, who had expectations we could never quite meet.
But he wasthere.
There to teach us a new killing stroke. There to smack the taste out of my mouth when I got smart. There overseeing our dawn workouts, then eating breakfast with us, which was dinner for him and Sebastian. Timing our dusk drills, then eating dinner with us, which was breakfast for him and Sebastian.
I could still feel the weight of his hand on my shoulder after a successful hunt. Still smell the copper-penny tang of blood in the air as he showed us how to track wounded prey through a forest. Still hear his cold, measured voice explaining exactly how much pressure it took to sever a spine with bare hands. Fucked up? Absolutely. But consistent. Present. There.
Lucian hurt us, sure, but he showed up to do it. That’s more than I could say for her.
