As I’m remembering how fierce she looked with her gun pointed at Majid, the door to the room opens, and the subject of my musings walks in.
She’s wearing a pair of jeans and a brown long-sleeved top, her thick hair caught in a ponytail behind her back and her feet clad in ballet-type flats.The bruise on her cheekbone is still there, but she covered it up with some makeup today, probably so she could video-chat with her parents without worrying them.She’s been talking to them almost daily since our arrival at the clinic.I think she feels guilty about scaring them with her disappearance again.
She’s also munching on an apple, her white teeth biting into the juicy fruit with evident enjoyment.
My heart begins to thump heavily in my ribcage as my chest expands with joy and relief.It’s like that every time I see her now, my reaction the same whether she’s been gone fifteen minutes or several hours.
“Hi.”She walks over and gracefully perches on the right side of my bed.Leaning down, she presses her soft lips to my cheek in a brief kiss, then lifts her head to smile at me.“Want some apple?”
“No, thanks, baby.”My voice turns husky as her touch makes me painfully aware of the fact that I haven’t fucked her since leaving the estate.“It’s all yours.”
“All right.”She bites into the apple.“I ran into Dr.Goldberg in the hallway,” she says after swallowing.“He said you’re getting better, and we can go home tomorrow.”
“Yes, that’s right.”I watch her tongue flick out to clean up a tiny piece of fruit from her lower lip, and a bolt of heat tightens my balls.I am definitely getting better—or at least my cock believes that I am.“We’ll leave as soon as he okays it.”
Nora bites off another piece of apple and chews it slowly, studying me with a peculiar expression.
“What is it, baby?”Reaching for her free hand, I bring her delicate palm up to my face and rub the back of her hand against my cheek.I know I’m probably scratching her soft skin with my stubble—I haven’t shaved in over a week—but I can’t resist the lure of her touch.“Tell me what’s on your mind.”
She puts the apple core down on a napkin on the bedstand.“We should talk about Peter,” she says quietly.“And about the promise I made to him.”
I tense, my grip on her palm tightening.“What promise?”
“The list.”Her fingers twitch in my grasp.“The list of names you promised him for the three years of service.I told him I’d give it to him as soon as you had it—if he helped me rescue you.”
“Fuck.”I stare at her in disbelief.I had been wondering how she’d persuaded Peter to disobey a direct order, and here is my answer.“You promised you’d help him get revenge if he assisted you in that insanity?”
Nora nods, her eyes trained on mine.“Yes.It was the only thing I could think of at the time.He knew that if you died, he wouldn’t get the list at all—and I told him he’d get it earlier if he helped me.”
My eyebrows snap together as a wave of fury rolls through me.That Russian motherfucker put my wife in mortal danger, and that’s not something I can ever forgive or forget.He might’ve saved my life, but he had risked Nora’s in order to do it.If he hadn’t disappeared after carrying out the rescue, I would’ve killed him for that.And now Nora wants me to give him that list?
Not fucking likely.
“Julian, I promised him,” she insists, apparently sensing my unvoiced reply.Her gaze is filled with uncharacteristic determination as she adds, “I know you’re mad at him, but the whole plan was my idea—and he didn’t want to do it at first.”
“Right.Because he knew your safety should’ve been his top priority.”Realizing I’m still squeezing her palm, I release her hand and say harshly, “The bastard’s lucky he’s still alive.”
“I understand that.”Nora gives me a level look.“So does Peter, believe me.He knew you’d react like this—which is why he left after dropping us off here.”
I inhale, trying to hang on to my temper.“And good riddance to him.He knows I’ll never trust him now.I ordered him to keep you safe on the estate, and what did he do?”I glare at her as the memory of her getting dragged into that windowless room, bloodied and scared, scrapes at my brain.“He fucking hand-delivered you to Majid!”
“Yes, and by doing so, saved your life—”
“I don’t care about my fucking life!”I sit up all the way, ignoring the jolt of pain in my ribs.“Don’t you get it, Nora?Youare the only person I care about.You—not me, not anyone else!”
She stares at me, and I see her large eyes beginning to glisten with moisture.“I know, Julian,” she whispers, blinking.“I know that.”
I look at her, and the anger drains out of me, replaced by an inexplicable need to make her understand.“I don’t know if you do, my pet.”My voice is quiet as I reach for her hand again, needing its fragile warmth.“You are everything to me.If something happened to you, I wouldn’t want to survive—I wouldn’t want a life that doesn’t have you in it.”
Her lips tremble, the tears pooling in her eyes before spilling over.“I know, Julian…” Her fingers curl around my palm, squeezing it tightly.“I know, because it’s the same for me.When I thought your plane went down—” she swallows, her voice breaking, “—and then afterwards, when I heard the gunshots during our call…”
I draw in a breath, her distress making my chest hurt.“Don’t, baby…” I bring her hand up to my lips and kiss the inside of her palm.“Don’t think about it anymore.It’s over—there’s nothing more to fear.Majid is gone, and we’re on the verge of completely eradicating Al-Quadar…”
As I speak, I see her expression flattening, her gaze growing strangely shuttered.It’s as if she’s trying to pull back her emotions, to build some kind of a mental wall to protect herself.“I know,” she says, and her lips stretch into the kind of empty smile I’ve often seen her wear since our rescue.“It’s done.He’s dead.”
“Are you sorry about that?”I ask, lowering her hand.I need to understand the source of her withdrawal, to get to the bottom of whatever is causing her to shut down like this.“Are you sorry you killed him, baby?Is that why you’ve been upset the last few days?”
She blinks, as if startled by my question.“I’m not upset.”
