Lucien is already by the bar, flirting with some girl who is way too old for him. I take a long sip of my second drink, the alcohol burning my lungs in a relaxing way while my eyes get stuck on the girl dancing around the pole.
Confusion runs through me as her almost naked body does nothing to me. Shouldn’t my hormones be at their peak right now? I watch porn but that’s different. Adrien already fucked someone and he couldn’t shut up about it.
I don’t really feel like doing it. I’ve never met any girls I like. My therapist keeps trying to connect it to what happened to my mom, while I just stare at the wall until the session ends, unable to talk about it.
I run a hand through my hair, not realizing how zoned out I am staring at the girl swinging around the pole.
“You need to get that virgin look off your face, Kasien. You’re supposed to be a man already,” Sylvia snaps at me when a wave of revulsion runs through my spine.
What the fuck.
Why is she talking about that?
Jesus.
That’s so fucking weird.
I give her a look of pure disgust, fighting the urge to smash her head on that table.
“No problem, let’s get it off right now,” that old motherfucker Devereaux says and laughs so hard that some of the slicked hair on his head stands up.
What the hell is he talking about?
He gestures to the dancer and takes a thick bundle of cash out of his back pocket, handing it to her.
“Take a room, honey,” he mumbles, gesturing to her.
Fuck no.
What are they doing?
My throat tightens so much I can’t talk. I give him a death stare instead.
What did he just do?
“I’m not going anywhere,” I say and look at Sylvia, wanting to rip her head off.
“Jesus, Kasien, don’t make a big deal out of it. Go,” she says, rolling her eyes.
I could kill her right here, if I just… no.
“I don’t want to,” I grit out, my voice getting deeper than I expected.
Sylvia leans into my ear so I’m the only one who can hear her.
“Stop embarrassing me or I’m sending that dog of yours on the streets.”
Adrien? Fucking hell.
She leans back to her sofa, smiling like nothing happened. I stare at her for a moment, frozen.
Then she gives me one final quick look and I just know I don’t have a choice.
I get up, and the girl patiently waiting by the sofa starts walking toward the back of the club as I follow her.
A lump rises in my throat. I’m gulping over and over and it’s not going away.
We’re walking through a dark corridor with dark red LED lights on the floor, passing doors that are quiet, then suddenlythere are noises and grunting from one of them. I have to clench my fist and press it to my mouth to stop the urge to vomit.
