The gold stiletto hit the floor-to-ceiling cabinet in the closet as I kicked it off, sighing in relief to have feeling back in my toes. My feet ached and I was ready to strip this dress off and get into loose clothing. Sonya knocked on the door.
“Miss, do you need help getting out of your dress?”
“I do! You can come in.”
Sonya walked into the closet, and I held my hair up off my back so she could unzip the zipper hidden underneath the row of faux buttons. If I had any reservations about her seeing me in my undergarments, those had been tossed out the window by the third time she helped me get dressed and undressed. She took the gown and put it back in the garment bag that hung on the rack.
“I appreciate you staying late tonight to help me. I don’t think I could have reached that zipper on my own,” I said.
“It’s my pleasure, miss. I have been there a time or two myself,” she replied with a wink. “I’ll take thisdownstairs and get it dry cleaned.” She smiled. “How did tonight go? Did you have any alone time with the prince?”
I returned her smile. “Yeah, we did. We sat and had a lovely conversation.”
I couldn’t let her know that the conversation about the future and what it would look like had sent me into a tiny spiral and led to me getting lost in the garden and in a greenhouse with Knox. Idefinitelycouldn’t let her know how close I came to kissing Knox again. That I couldn’t stop thinking about his lips on mine. That if he had kissed me, it would have led to me getting on my knees in front of him, because I couldn’t stop picturing the night he stood in my kitchen almost naked or the way he looked down at me with those hooded eyes and half smile. That I would have done anything to keep that smile on his face. I absolutely couldn’t tell her any of that.
“That is wonderful. He seems like such a nice man.”
“He really is.” I smiled again, though it felt empty.
It wasn’t a lie. He was a great man. And yet:the spark.
That was the one thing missing when it came to Oliver. Yeah, he was handsome but there wasn’t that spark.
My body didn’t light up when he touched me like it did with Knox.
I didn’t forget my words when I was around Oliver, and I forgot my own name when I was with Knox.
I didn’t get jealous when Adelaide looked at him with her little doe eyes when she thought no one was looking, but the thought of Renata even hypothetically going after Knox caused a strong sense of possession to take over my body.
Iwantedto feel that spark with Oliver because I knew I should, and it would make the decision for my future so much easier.
After Sonya said her goodbyes and closed the door, Iwashed my face and moisturized and then climbed into bed. It had been such a long night, and I needed to turn my mind off. If I didn’t, there was zero chance of me falling asleep.
An hour ticked by and I still couldn’t fall asleep. My mind just wouldn’t quiet. Between the almost-kiss with Knox in the greenhouse, the conversation I had with Oliver about everything that was to come, and then trying to figure out who put my name down and spent that much money so I could spend time with Knox, I just couldn’t slow my racing thoughts.
Then I remembered the Vegas bachelorette party and the weed gummies that had been in my suitcase. Even though I had panicked over them at the airport, I had never checked to see if they were still in my bag. If I did have them, they were exactly what I needed to calm my mind and get a good night's rest.
I jumped out of bed and went into the closet where my bags were stored. I flipped through a few pockets of the first suitcase, not remembering where I had put the little baggie. I moved onto the next bag. It had been stored upside down, so I pulled it out and started to unzip it when a black vibrator fell out onto my big toe and started vibrating across the floor.
“Oh shit!” I yelled. I picked it up, flipping it over and over trying to find the buttons. I finally found the power button and turned it off. I started to put it back into the bag but stopped.
I stood there for a minute just looking at the vibrator. It was black silicone, about six inches long, and had two little rabbit ears that sat at the base and vibrated like crazy when it was on. If I couldn’t find my gummies, maybe this was the next best thing to calm me down and silence my mind.
Yeah, this would do the trick instead. And honestly maybe if I got off, I could put all those Knox thoughts to rest. Get him out of my system by proxy, right? I took the vibrator and climbedback into the big bed. I knew it wouldn’t take much to get myself in the mood. All I had to think about was the way Knox ran his fingers through my hair earlier and pulled at the nape of my neck. That had made me soak through my panties right there in the greenhouse. Or I could think about the way he picked me up and put me against the wall in the closet at the hotel.
I turned the vibrator on the lowest setting, slid it down the front of my white lace underwear and rubbed it through my folds. Thinking about Knox was exactly the thing to get my core dripping wet.
I thought about the way his eyes roamed over my body last night. He was shit at keeping his thoughts off his face when he was turned on. And I knew that he was excited by the way that his considerable cock had bulged through his pants and pushed into my stomach when I was pressed against him in the greenhouse. I had almost told him how badly I wanted him to take that tie off and wrap it around my hands and have his way with me right there.
That thought led me to wondering what it would be like if he was in the bed with me. He would take that tie and bind my hands above my head, maybe even to the headboard so I wouldn’t be able to move, as he kissed down my neck, to my chest and focused on my breasts.
I ran my free hand up under the baggy shirt I had put on to sleep in. As I palmed my breast and ran my thumb over my nipple, I had to hold back a small moan. Squeezing my nipple a little bit, I imagined Knox sucking and biting on it.
God, I want that so badly.
My core was growing slicker, and I needed more. I kicked the vibrator up another setting and rubbed it along my clit before setting the tip just inside of me. I imagined that it was Knox’s large hands rubbing in and out of me. It felt amazing—not as good as I knew Knox would be, but it was definitely doing the job. I was so close to coming.
The thought of Knox moving down my body, leaving trails of kisses and little nips on the inside of my thighs, was edging me closer and closer. I imagined the way it would feel when he got to my core, breathing his warm breath on my sensitive flesh and telling me how delicious I looked. I flipped the vibrator around and skimmed the little bunny ears over my clit, picturing Knox running his tongue over it. I wanted to feel him licking me so badly. I knew what it felt like to have his tongue in my mouth, skimming along my bottom lip, but I wanted to know what it felt like to have it inside of me. What was it like to have him suck and kiss me down there? What noises would he make if I came on his mouth?
