A flicker of something like disapproval flashed across Mr. Miller’s eyes. “Indeed, Miss Miller is my sister.” He paused, dipping his head politely. “I really must be getting along now, Your Grace. There’s a great deal to do if we’re to be ready for the wedding festivities. If there’s nothing I can do for you, may I be excused?”
Jeremy puffed out a frustrated breath. “I just want to know if she has left her chambers at all.”
“I believe so,” Mr. Miller replied. “I have seen her myself in the library and her study. And she also took her daily walk this morning, as she always does.”
“What? When?” Jeremy had ridden all around the grounds of Stonebridge and beyond, yet he hadn’t seen hide nor hair of her.
The butler cleared his throat. “She walks before dawn, Your Grace. She returned long before you set out for your morning ride.”
So, she had become a ghost in her own home, sneaking around right under Jeremy’s nose? He would have been lying if he said that her absence hadn’t worried him, still unconvinced that she wouldn’t try to run away to avoid marrying him. But what could he do if she refused to see him?
“I see.” Jeremy nodded, somewhat envious of Mr. Miller’s ability to be near her and to be permitted into her confidence. “And is she… well?”
The butler sighed. “It isn’t my place to say, Your Grace. You will have to ask her at the wedding.” He glanced toward the old grandfather clock in the hall. “Speaking of which, shouldn’t you be asking your valet to prepare you for the occasion?”
“I don’t have a valet,” Jeremy retorted, for he had never understood the purpose.
What sort of man couldn’t dress himself? What sort of man wouldn’t feel strange having another man dress him, as if he were a child?
“I could assist, if you like?” Mr. Miller said.
Jeremy laughed tightly and shook his head. “That won’t be necessary. I have dressed meself since I was a bairn, and I have nay intention of that changing.”
Peeling off his damp coat as if to prove the point, he hung it up on the stand by the door and headed for the staircase.
“What of a shave?” the butler called after him.
“What of it?” Jeremy replied. “I’ll rephrase, Mr. Miller: I have nay intention of anything changing.”
On the bottom step, he paused and glanced up to the landing, where that infernal curtain still hung to mark the last bastion of Anna’s territory… and he felt his heart grow heavy in his chest.
Why wouldn’t she hate me?he reasoned as he began to make his way upstairs. He’d had a week longer to think of their last encounter and the mistakes in judgment that he might have made, and one stark truth kept circling back in his mind, like a vulture wheeling around the carrion of his future with her.I took everything from her.
Of course, she was hurt. Of course, she was furious. Of course, marrying him in this way was the last thing she wanted. Of course, she couldn’t stand to be around him. As well as her home and her peace, he’d taken the one thing she had left that was all her own: her ability to decide what her future should look like, and who she might share it with.
Why,Jeremy had declared the union didn’t matter. To Anna, it must have just felt like the final blow in a war she couldn’t fight anymore.
“Thank you, Katherine,” Anna said quietly, her voice hoarse.
The lady’s maid smiled in the reflection of Anna’s vanity mirror, but it was a sad echo of a smile that didn’t reach her watery eyes.
“You’re a beautiful bride,” Katherine said, her breath hitching. “The most beautiful I have ever seen.”
“At least I have that,” Anna replied wryly, her heart sore, her body leaden after a week’s worth of sleepless nights and days with no appetite or joy. “I am still tempted to wear black, just to have one last little morsel of control. A last little surprise.”
Katherine moved toward the armoire and pulled out a length of rustling bombazine. “You still have your mourning gown from when the Devil saw fit to take the late duke back to where he belongs. I could make some alterations; there’s still enough time.”
Puffing out a breath, Anna swiveled on the vanity stool and reached out her hands for her friend. “I am sorry, Katherine. How can you stand to listen to me complain when I am clearly being ungrateful?”
Poor Katherine hadn’t been fortunate enough to escape Robert’s clutches. The wretch had forced her, taken his pleasure, and brutally discarded her. Indeed, when Anna had first arrived at Stonebridge, Katherine had been hidden away in the gamekeeper’s cottage, so that Robert would not see her and kick her out of his employment for a second time.
It really is your first time seeing me as a bride…
That recovery in the gamekeeper’s cottage had been the reason Katherine was not there to assist with the first wedding.
Anna had only learned about Katherine after Robert was dead, when Mr. Miller had asked if the physician who had come to check the cause of death might also tend to his sister. Of course, Anna had agreed, and had paid the fee herself, though it was much later that she’d learned about why Katherine had been so unwell… because the shame had prompted the sweet, dishonored woman to take her own life. At least, she had attempted to.
Anna shook her head, feeling guilty. “I think of all the women in this country who are suffering, who are dreading marriage to cruel and wicked men through no choice of their own, who are trapped with such awful beasts. What right do I have to be upset?”
