I know what he means. The other kind is what happens when Rhys encounters a strange alpha in the wrong circumstances. The kind of irritation that doesn't stay irritation.
"She settled him," I say.
"One look," Malcolm says. "A word. A touch. That's all it takes. You saw it."
I did see it. Vee's hand on his arm in the kitchen. How the tension went out of his shoulders immediately. Like a switch.
"What if she doesn't want me?" The question slips out. "Not because I'm not an alpha. Just because I'm not enough."
Malcolm snorts. "Have you seen the way she looks at you?"
"She looks at all of us."
"Not the same way she looks at you." Malcolm's grin is visible even in the dark. "She watches you like she's trying to figure out how you do it. How you keep everything running. She's fascinated by you, man."
"That's not—"
"And today? When you couldn't get the printer to stop jamming and she helped you fix it?" Malcolm shakes his head. "She was glowing, Finn. She likes being the one who has answers. She likes working with you."
I think about this morning. How she leaned over my shoulder, the small smile when she fixed the loose screw in the printer tray. The comfortable rhythm we fell into when she stuck around to help with more.
"What if it's not enough?" I ask again, quieter.
"Then it's not enough,” he says. "But you won't know unless you try. And sitting here drowning in insecurity isn't going to change anything."
"Harsh."
"True."
I take another drink, the bottle is almost empty now.
"I'm terrified," I admit.
"Of what?"
"That she'll pick us. That Chase will get the flag lifted and we'll bond her and then one day she'll wake up and realize she settled." The words pour out. "That she could have had a pack of three or more alphas but instead she got three alphas and a beta who can't give her half of what she needs."
Malcolm is quiet for a long moment.
"You really think that's how she sees you?" he asks finally.
I shake my head, not a denial, just an honest answer.
"Well I do,” Malcolm says. "You're the guy who texted her in the middle of the night when her light was on, just to ask if she wanted to bake cookies. She remembers that kind of thing. That's not nothing."
"That's not the same as wanting—"
"It's better." Malcolm cuts me off. "Trust me, Finn. It's better."
Movement on the back porch makes us both turn.
Alex stands there in the shadows, arms crossed over his chest. The porch light is off but I can make out his silhouette.
My heart drops into my stomach.
How long has he been standing there? Did he hear what I said about being relieved when he got the flag?
Alex doesn't say a word. He just stands there looking at us, then he turns and walks back inside, the door closing behind him.
