She, too, took back her power.
“It became a thing of legend in some circles. A threat that brought men like Aster into my life.”
“You saved her,” she repeats firmly. “And you said it yourself: she’s thriving, surrounded by people who love her. She’s independent, and capable, and brave. You made it so.”
“Aster knew what we’d done,” I murmur. “Worse, he had proof that would get Scarlett in trouble. That’s why I agreed to this job. That’s why I was the guy who came into your world and lied. He liked my brand of pain.”
I need to confess my sins. I’m desperate for her to know what I am before our time is up.
“I’m just like his other guards, Nova. I’m cruel and mean and what nightmares are made of. You only like me because your hormones are tricking you. But the things you think about Tank?” I pull back to search her eyes. “Someone else thinks those of me. I’m not better than he is. I’m the same.”
“You saved your sister,” she presses stubbornly. “And you committed acts ordered by someone else. Then you quit.” Witha grunt of pain and a shaking support arm, she pushes up and rests her knee against my ribs. “You quit that world, and you created something better. Forgive yourself.”
“No, I?—”
“For me.” She takes my hand in hers and swipes her tender cheek on her shoulder. “Forgive yourself forme. Because when your time is up… in seventy years from now, I’d like you to find me again.”
“Nova—”
“I’m gonna be where the good people go. In the clouds with my family, watching while you live your life and buy a house next to your sister’s. She’ll marry a douchebag.” She releases a shaky laugh. “And you’ll sulk about it. You can do for Scarlett what Ryan wanted for me. Weird codependence, but beautiful, peaceful contentment.”
“There is no peace for me if you’re gone.” I caress her jaw and will my heart to slow. To calm. Because if it stops before I get her out, this was all for naught, anyway. “If you give up and die here, then I’m lying down right beside you. I won’t leave without you, Nova.”
“You so willingly choose to break a little sister’s heart?” She swipes the tears from the edge of her jaw. “You have the power to save her again.”
“You’re asking me to sacrifice you!”
“This is how things are meant to be.” She glances down between us, so I follow her gaze and find my exposed ankle.
“Nova—”
“We’re running out of time.” She reaches for my knife.
“No.” I slap my hand over hers, trapping her in my palm while she traps the blade in hers.
“Time is not in our favor,” she whimpers, choking on a hitching breath. “If he comes back before we’re done, we trade whatcouldhave been a peaceful goodbye for something so much worse.”
Where’s my third option? Where the fuck is it!
“I don’t want to look into Tank’s eyes when I die.” Fresh tears spill onto her splotchy cheeks. “I don’t want it to hurt. And on the off chance there’s nothing else after death—no heaven, no clouds, no eternity where I get to dance amongst the dahlias and watch you live your life—I don’t wanthiseyes to be the last I see before everything goes black.”
She twists her hand, pulling, maneuvering, escaping my grip. And then she turns her hand over and reveals my knife pressed to her palm.
“You can close your eyes, if you want.” She stares down at the handle, massaging the switch on the side until the blade springs free and the sound that once comforted me, an assurance of protection, becomes the reason bile burns my esophagus.
“You can plug your ears and turn away.” She brings shaking, unsure eyes up to mine. “Any tips? I can’t mess this up. But if there’s a way to do it so it hurts less…”
A deafening boom rocks the door and brings us around in horror.
“Time’s up!” Tank calls. “My turn.”
26
NOVA
FROM THE GRAVE
Tank bursts through the door with a vicious, snarling smile contorting his face. His eyes are terrifying, wide and hungry, and when he starts this way, I cry out and tuck Lincoln’s blade back into its handle, the handle into my bra where a coin once rested.
