“Pita! You look beautiful!” Dad exclaims.
“He’s right. Your hair is coming back nicely,” Mom says.
I tuck a lock of my hair behind my ear, just glad it is getting long enough to do so. Losing my hair to chemo was a difficult loss. I felt silly at the time, but I couldn’t help my emotions. I mean, I was fighting for my life, but I got hung up on my hair falling out. Chemo sucked big donkey balls, and losing my hair felt like the final blow. I didn’t realize how much I defined some of my femininity with my hair until it was gone. Dad bought me a very expensive wig, which helped me feel better at the time. It felt like I was getting a piece of myself back, especially since everything else was going so badly at the time.
“Daddy, how are you? How’s your garden doing?” I ask, moving on from those bittersweet memories.
“It’s good, Pita. I’m going to have a ton of mangoes this year!” Dad says with a triumphant grin. “I need to figure out a way to thwart the raccoons before they pick it clean. It’s war this year!”
“Never mind all that!” Mom interrupts. “So… Are you dating any of those aliens yet? You’ve already been there for months. Do you have any likely candidates? I’m not getting any younger, you know, and I’m ready to be a grandma!” Mom leans too close to the screen, so all I see is one glaring eye and part of her nose. “Your sister is dating a very nice man. He works at one of those fancy internet start-up companies. It looks like it might be getting serious between the two of them. At the rate you’re going, she’s going to give me a grandbaby before you do.”
“No, Mom. I’m not dating anyone. You can’t just casually date these guys. Unlike most men, they don’t shy away from commitment. They’re all ready to get married immediately.”
“That sounds perfect. Go pick out one of the high-ranking ones and make him like you. Don’t let yourself go, and he will worship the ground you walk on.”
“Oh my god, Mom! No, I’m not just gonna go pick one out like he’s a shelter dog. Besides, if I did like one, he’d probably be too dumb to realize I’m interested unless I spell it out for him. These guys don’t know how to flirt or pick up on clues.”
“Men are all idiots. You know that.”
“I’m sitting right here,” Dad complains, looking over at Mom in exasperation.
“Oh, I didn’t mean you, honey. Just the rest of the male population are idiots,” Mom says, giving me a slow wink. I just shake my head at my parents’ antics. Dad, knowing Mom all too well, gives her a poke in her side. Mom giggles like a schoolgirl.
“If you two start getting flirty, I will hang up, so help me. My eyes still haven’t recovered from the time I caught you two making out at Uncle Hien’s birthday party. So gross!” I say with an exaggerated shudder of disgust.
“Such a prude,” Mom lectures. “So, tell us what else is happening up there on the ship.”
My mom loves to gossip, so I quickly catch them up on the ship happenings. I tell them about Laney’s pregnancy; the poor thing has been super nauseous lately.
“Get her ginger tea and plain crackers,” Mom advises. “It was what always worked for me.”
“I will tell her,” I promise.
“What else is happening?” Mom asks.
“Oh! I’m planning another Presenting Ceremony for some of the bride volunteers. I should have been a wedding planner.”
“You should include yourself in the wedding. Go find an alien husband. Aren’t there hundreds of single alien-men on the ship? I’m sure there’s one there who is perfect for you,” Mom commands.
“Mom! I will not be getting married next week, so let it go.” I narrow my eyes at Mom, so she’ll know I mean business. Sometimes she reminds me of one of those tiny yapping dogs. She’s loud, she’s got nothing but attitude, but she’s so cute I wanna put her in my purse and carry her around.
“It’s just all my friends are becoming grandmothers, and I see how much they love it. At the rate you’re going, I will be too old and feeble to hold my grandchildren. Think about how important it is for your children to have their grandparents be a part of their lives.”
“My non-existent children are going to be okay. Wait a minute! You never had me and Anh spend much time withyourmother.”
“Ugh, you and your sister didn’t miss out with my mother. She was an overbearing woman. Always thought she was right, no matter what. You’re lucky I limited how much time you had to spend with her. Nothing was ever good enough for her,andshe was terrible to your father. She thought she should have a say in who I married! The gall!” Mom says, utterly unaware of the irony of her stance.
A buzz on my tablet interrupts before I can formulate my response. Saved by the bell, because whatever I was about to say would have only got me into hot water.
“Hold on. I’m getting an important message.”
Switching to the message system, I see a mandatory ship-wide meeting in the main cargo hangar is starting in fifteen minutes. Even though I know what the meeting is about, my nerves feel rattled.
Switching back to the call, I look at my parents as my mother whispers something in Dad’s ear. Whatever she said makes my dad grin, and he turns and brushes his nose against her cheek. I clear my throat loudly to make sure we don’t have a repeat of Uncle Hien’s party.
“Hey, I have to go. I just got a notification that I need to attend a meeting in fifteen minutes. I need to freshen up before I go.”
“So soon? We’ve barely had time to talk!” Mom exclaims dramatically.
