“Wait…” the pieces in my mind seemed to be clicking together like a puzzle. “Is that why you’re back in the village. Is that why you’re not staying here with me?”
Alaw blushed. “Yes.”
“Bloody hell Alaw, how did that happen?”
“Well, Alun was down for a course in one of the big garages in Swansea for the weekend and we texted for a bit.”
“When was this?” I asked. I hadn’t;t known my sister come back here for ages.
“Six months ago…he’s been coming down almost every weekend. I figured, since I work from home, that I should come up here for the week. I’ve been staying in the flat over the garage with him.”
“Well, I’m gutted you never told me…but happy for you.”
“Thank you. I don’t like keeping secrets from my big brother,” Alaw said.
“Well at least I should see more of you now,” I said.
“Well…about that. Alun has been talking about me moving back up here. So much of my work has been remote recently that I hardly need to go back to the office. He’s looking at buying one of the houses down by the beach, maybe renting the space out above the garage to someone else.”
“You’re joking! You’d leave Swansea to come back here?”
“Hiraeth is my home. Always has been and always will be. Anyway, when you going to convince lover boy he’s better off here?”
“I don’t want to,” I said. “I mean…I want to, but I don’t want to hold him here. James has so much ambition and a huge career in London. It’s not fair on me to have him here. I don’t even have a proper job for God’s sake, I’m struggling just to keep a roof…” I tailed off as I realised I had said way too much.
“Struggling to keep a roof over your head is it? You bloody idiot.”
“I can’t help it if I’m poor, can I?” I felt like a child but I’d already said it now. “I have no education past GCSE, Mam and Dad left me with a creaky old cottage in the arse end of nowhere and a town full of people who need my help.”
“A town full of people who, if they want your help, can just pay.”
“T-they do…”
“Don’t you lie to me Llywelyn. Alun said you fixed a hole in his roof the other day and refused anything more than 20 quid. For 3 hours work and materials! If he charged anything like that for his work his garage would have gone under years ago.”
“But he’s a friend!” I said. I remembered James being shocked at my rates just days before and realised that maybe he was talking sense.
“And I know the school have been looking for a permanent caretaker. I know for a fact the deputy head has mentioned it to you several times, and you keep ducking the point. The people of this town want your help, and they want to help you too. But you’re too bloody stubborn to do more than survive.” There was pity in Alaw’s eyes. “I know how difficult this is. God knows I ran away when Mum and Dad died because I couldn’t cope with the way people in this village looked at me. But it’s different now, we’re not teenagers any more. You should be working to live, not living to work. And maybe then you wouldn’t feel so intimidated by a man who has the tiniest bit of drive behind him.”
I stopped my scrubbing completely. “You’re probably right.”
“Probably? I am right and you know it.”
“You’re a smug cow when you think you’re right,” I said. I could feel my lips turning upwards. Perhaps I was good enough to keep James around. Maybe I had a little bit of life sorting to do, and maybe he’d say no. But it was worth asking him.
“Good thing I brought extra then, because me being right is gonna rock your world tonight.” Alaw reached into the second bag, pulling out a set of nice mugs, new bedding and what looked like a fabric laundry basket collapsed down. “I can’t resist a bargain, me. And you’re not sleeping with someone in your childhood bed. Time to start sleeping in the master.”
I was about to retort but it died on my lips. She was right. I’d left the bedroom untouched long enough to respect Mam and Dad’s memory. Most people lost their virginity in their childhood bed I was sure, but then again most people probably weren’t losing it in their 30s.
“Thank you,” I said. Alaw just smiled.
“By the way, I’m kidnapping Dinky,” she said. “Don’t want her mentally scarred by the noises coming from her Daddy’s bedroom. I’ll make sure she’s brought back in one piece by Sunday.”
“You can’t just kidnap my dog for a whole weekend! Who’s to say she even wants to go with you?”
“Well I’m trying to convince Alun that a puppy wouldenrich our lives, and if you think she doesn’t want to come with me…” she turned to where Dinky was laying in her bed. “Want to come and stay with auntie Alaw? With plenty of walks and cuddles and treats?”
Dinky jumped out of bed and jumped up on Alaw, whimpering with excitement. “Traitor,” I muttered.
