“Not what I meant. I mean, he’s not expecting you to be there, so if you change your mind, there will be no disappointment. You can still turn around.”
“Are you trying to get me to back off, Havoc?”
“No. I’m trying to make sure you’re ready for this. You’ve come too far for me to throw you in the deep end and watch you drown.”
“Are you worried your old lady will kick your ass?” I tease as he starts the truck.
“Oh, she’ll kill me for keeping it a secret that I’ve had you hidden away here.”
“Shit, I don’t want to cause any problems between you two. That was not my intention at all.”
“I know. Don’t worry about your sister. We’ll be fine. Besides, you and Star are family. You asked me for help. Of course, I was going to give it to you. I love your sister more than anything else on earth, but I’m not blind to her antics. She wouldn’t be able to resist coming over, inserting herself into your life, whether you were ready yet or not. She loves you and misses you. She doesn’t know what it’s like trying to acclimate after being alone for so long. I know it wasn’t the same thing for me, but I get how much of a head fuck it is that everyone expects you to slip into their lives with seamless ease. But nothing about living outside of the cage is easy. At least you know what to expect in the cage…” He drifts off, but I nod, swallowing hard.
“Yeah. Better the devil you know and all that jazz. There are only so many times someone can ask you how you’re feeling before you snap. But we’re doing better now. Both of us are.”
“Good. I’m glad. Doesn’t mean this won’t be rough on you.”
“I’ll be fine, Havoc. I need to do this.”
He stares at my face before relenting with a sigh. “Stubbornness must run in your family.”
I grin as he pulls away from the curb. “You have no idea.”
* * *
By the time we pull up at the hospital, I’m a nervous wreck. The last time I was here was after?—
Nope. Not going there. This isn’t about me. It’s about Ambros. The man who pulled me out of hell. Well, now it’s time for me to return the favor.
I jump out and walk around the truck to get Star, but Havoc beats me to it. “You get her all the time,” he complains, making me chuckle.
“I should hope so. She’s my daughter.”
“She’s my niece and I’m her favorite uncle, aren’t I, Star?”
She giggles and lifts her hands toward him.
“You’re her only uncle, doofus.”
“That’s President Doofus to you. Shit, grab my cut, would you?”
I reach over and grab Havoc’s cut from beside the car seat and hand it to him, taking Star while he slides it on. Once he’s done, he steals Star back from me and closes the door.
“Okay, ladies, let’s do this.”
I walk beside him, struggling to keep up with his long-legged stride. He doesn’t ask anyone which way to go, so I assume he knows where we’re heading. I feel my stomach cramp the closer we get. When we step on the elevator, I have to squeeze my hands into fists and count in my head to distract myself. I’m not great with small spaces. Though the elevator is a decent size, I’d still rather not fall to my death in a metal coffin.
“You okay?” Havoc asks as the numbers flick by the higher we get. I nod, focusing on my breathing. When the doors open, I practically throw myself out. It takes me a couple of seconds to calm my racing heart and pull myself together.
Havoc moves past me, looking over his shoulder as he waits for me to give him the okay to keep going. I nod and follow him once more, coming to a halt not long after when I hear a gasp.
Havoc steps aside, which is when I see Neveah staring at me.
“Citi?”
Before I answer, Ambros’s bowed head snaps up. His eyes lock on mine, stealing my voice and my breath.
I see the exact moment it hits him that everything has changed in the blink of an eye. He wavers on his feet. I don’t think—I just react, running toward him as he stumbles, catching his weight when his legs buckle, and lowering him to the ground with me. I wrap my arms around him and hold on tight as his body racks with sobs.
