“I hear you. But don’t let Soya nem talk you into clubbing or nothing.”
I smirked and shook my head. “Now, where did that come from?”
“Cause, man. I get the vibes. Since she moved in you been going to brunches more often. You be missing my calls. And it’s just a matter of time before she’ll have you in them clubs with her.” “Well,clubbingaintreallymything.But…sinceyou mentioned it, I guess you should know that…I’m going out for my
birthday next weekend.”
“Oh, yeah? When was this decided?” “When Soya got a section for me as a gift.”
“Maannn,” Too Low drawled. “There goes that bullshit.” “How is that bullshit, Too Low?”
He sucked his teeth. “Since when do we go to the club without each other?”
“Never. But you’re not here, right now. And I just wanna go outside, baby. That’s it. It’s not like I’ll go to the club and suddenly forget about the love of my life.”
“The love of your life, huh? Yeah, I better be your first, and only fucking love too.”
“You are.”
“Alright, Babi. I guess I’ma accept that you going out. Especially cause you told me beforehand.”
“Okay. But…that also means that I won’t be able to come see you that Saturday. I’ll have to come Sunday.”
“See, man. Now youreallypushing it. But it’s your birthday, and I want you to enjoy yourself. So, we can roll with it. In fact,it’s the perfect time to break in those Gucci tennis shoes that you never wore.”
“Tennis shoes? Boy, bye. I’m about to be twenty-nine. I gotta step out in some heels.”
“Heels? Oh, so now you wanna rock some heels. But I couldn’t pay you to wear them muthafuckas when I was home.”
“Thingschange—”
“You have one minute left,” the automated operator announced.
Too Low exhaled. “I guess that I’ma call you back one last time before you go to bed tonight. Love you.”
“Okay.Loveyoutoo,”Iresponded,beforeendingthecall.
Foralongsecondafterwards,Istoodinthemiddleof my living room, deep in thought. Too Low and his control-lingwayswerebeginningtomakemeponderonthingsthat I never considered before. And it wasn’t about me andanother man. I sometimes questioned if I was truly living… and if I could go back in time, would I still choose this same life for myself. And as much as he loved me, did I deserve more?
“That nigga better get his shit together, if he knows like I know,” I grumbled, as I stomped back downstairs.
“’Bout time,” Soya commented, when I stepped back out onto the porch.
I gave her the finger, before reclaiming my seat.
Casey gazed at me. “That nigga be riding that ass, huh?” “Hmm?” I raised my brows, wondering what she was talking
about.
“I’m talking about your old man. That nigga be in the jail-house, stressing. Worrying about your big, "ne ass.”
Iscratchedmyscalp.“Ionknowaboutallthat.”
Soya smirked, while shaking her head. “One thing about it, Too Low knows what he got. It’s Bambi who acts like she can’t see her reflection in the mirror.”
I turned to look at my cousin. “And what is that supposed to mean?”
She locked eyes with me. “It means that you don’t recognize your own beauty. Not saying that you have a low self-esteem. Cause you don’t. But you also don’t move like most women who looks like you would. And sometimes…I think you intentionally always wear those big ass Nike t-shirts to camouflage your body, hoping that nobody notices that shape.”
