“Ex-professor,” I correct.
“Ex-professor.” She smiles. “But if you love him, then I know he must be good. You wouldn’t have it in you to love him otherwise. And if you tell me this is what you want, thatyou’re happy and he’s good for you and to you, then that’s all that matters. All I want is for my boys to be happy.”
I wish James, Sadie, and Nash could have had a mom like her, that they knew what it was like to have unconditional love from a parent. Sadie and Nash will know what it’s like to have it from James, even if he’s just their older brother. And maybe James will know what it’s like from my mom.
“Thanks, Ma. That means the world to me. The kids are so cool. I’ve been playing basketball with Nash. He joined the team for the first time. He’s had two home games, and we went to both. And Sadie…she’s so sweet. You’ll love her. She’s an artist. James has been hanging her stuff up all over their apartment. She drew a picture for me the other day.”
Mom smiles. “I can’t wait to meet them.”
“I was thinking for my birthday. We could have Kota and Elena over. Tash has been helping Sadie with her hair, so she and Hannah have met them. We’ll have them here too. We’ll have to pretend James and I aren’t together, though. We don’t want to throw too much at the kids at once. They’re still adjusting to living with James.”
“I think that’s a smart decision.”
I hang out there for another hour or so, just spending time with her and talking to her about James.
When I head out, Mom hugs me, wrapping her arms tightly around me. “I’m proud of you.”
“Thanks, Ma. I wouldn’t be who I am without you.”
“Yes, you would, but thank you.”
The second I’m in my truck, I message James. He knows I planned to tell her about us today, and I’m sure he’s a nervous wreck waiting to hear.
Me: Hey, I told her. It went well. She’s excited to meet you.
My phone rings immediately, and I chuckle.
“Are you sure?” he says instead of hello.
“I’m sure.”
“She probably thinks I’m terrible—your older professor with kids.”
“She doesn’t think you’re terrible. I promise. We’ll be okay, James. I know it’s hard for you to believe that, but we will.”
He sighs. “It’s easy to believe it when you say it.”
“Then I’ll tell you every day.”
*
The past coupleof weeks have flown by. We’ve gone to every one of Nash’s home games, and I spent every evening at their apartment afterward. It’s the extent of our outings together—we don’t go out to dinner, or stop by the grocery store, or go to a movie—but I understand his concern. For now, I appreciate what we do have.
We’ve also kept up weekly appointments with Tasha. She’s been trying to teach James and Sadie more about her hair, which is in loose curls today. Tasha styled it yesterday, for the first time leaving her hair out of braids. James had no idea what she meant when she was talking about Sadie’s curl pattern, and I don’t know much more than him, just what I’ve heard from Hannah over the years. But she’s got the most beautiful, bouncing ringlets. I’ve caught her looking at herself in the mirror more than once since it was done yesterday.
“So this is like a family thing or what?” Nash asks, all four of us in James’s SUV as we head to Mom’s house for my birthday.
“Family and friends,” I tell him.
“Tasha will be there too,” Sadie says. “And Hannah.”
“Yep. You’ll get to meet my mom, and my brother, Dakota, and his girlfriend, Elena. He’s an idiot, but I love him.”I’ve had conversations with everyone, and they all know that James and I are together but that the kids don’t know, so at least I won’t have to deal with any ribbing about bringing home a boyfriend for the first time.
A boyfriend who has a cage on his cock right now because it’s my birthday and I wanted him to wear it for me. We pretend he didn’t want to wear it, but we both know he’ll find comfort in that today when he’ll be nervous and overwhelmed and I won’t be able to do anything noticeable to soothe him.
“How come you invited us?” Nash asks, and Sadie swats his arm.
“Because you’re my friends, aren’t you?”
