“I have spent an hour and a half trying to make this, and you’re just vacuuming the plates!” Even if frustrated, she looks sweet with her short straight platinum blonde hair swaying as she speaks. She rolls the ‘r’ everytime she speaks. My mother is French but she moved out years ago, the accent just slightly pops up here and there.
Dad eats another one, holding her gaze with a smirk. He likes to make mom frustrated sometimes.
She huffs, reaching behind her and starts to unlace her apron. A hand reaches and stops her, Dad wraps his arms around her front, whispering something in her ear then plants a quick kiss to her cheek. Her cheeks flush as she rolls her eyes.
Dad walks over to me with a smile as he kisses my forehead, taking a seat on the stool beside mine.
“Ready to go, bug?”
I nod, hopping off the stool as I head towards the front door. The fog keeps thickening as the years pass by, leaves crunch beneath my feet as I hold my bag and hop in dad’s car.
Dad gets out of the house, putting on his jacket as mom waves at me with a smile but I can see the hesitation in her eyes. She would like me to stay in the safety of our home and I consider if I should change my mind.
No, Clay has no friends at school and I want to be with him.
The car parks in front of the school. It doesn’t look like much, more of an abandoned place. Dad’s hands tighten on the steering wheel as he looks at the school. I have been sitting silently for a few minutes, not making a move to get out and dad has been waiting patiently. The comfortable silence breaks. “Bug, listen to me.” His voice softens as he faces me. “You don’t need to go if you don’t want to. If you don’t like the teachers online, I can easily find better ones for you.”
I don’t like that they always keep me protected, I need to stop being weak.
I stay silent as he holds my cheek, turning my head to face him. “I know you’re scared and you have every right to be. No one deserves you. Me and your mom are here for you, okay?” He assures me, waiting for my decision as a tear slips down my face.
He grabs the wheel “that’s it, we are going home.” I grab him arm with a smile. I need to be a big girl. “Dad, I want to go.” I make every effort to sound convincing.
He looks into my eyes for a bit and sighs. “Alright,bug. But whenever something happens, don’t even hesitate a second to reach us. I will pick you up in a minute and you won’t set foot again here, understand?” I nod as I lean over and hug him. “Love you, dad.”
He hugs me back tightly. “Love you too, bug” he waits till I pull away.
I grab my bag and get out of the car as I walk towards the entrance. He calls out to me, resting his hand over the car door. “I sneaked some macarons in your lunch pack.” I look over my shoulder at him as my eyes widen. The kids probably would laugh at me. “Dad! Don’t embarrass me.” I whisper yell but I couldn't help but giggle when he winks at me.
He drives off and I take a deep breath and walk in.
The air feels thicker, the wall paints are chipped. No one is around except for a few who glances at me as I walk by through the hallway. A board is hung at the end of the hall, chalk handwriting reads each class and their duration. But the board seems untouched for a long time as some of the chalk has faded away. Clay is two years older than me so I can’t go attend his classes. I just have to survive through mine and hopefully we will meet at lunch break.
I head towards my current class as I find it empty, except for a group of girls at the end of the classroom. My steps falter, hesitating. They’re talking and laughing, which seems nice. I step inside and sit down on the front desk, organizing my stuff. My purple notebook with a yellow butterfly on the cover that my mom got for me.
I feel more at ease as I wait for the teacher to come in. Someone taps my shoulder and I look over to find a brunette with her hair in a ponytail, her other friends behind her.
“What’s your name?” She chews on gum.
“Elsie, what’s yours?”
“Donna” she answers then points out at every girl, introducing them to me and I grin. We talk for a bit and I can’t seem to shut up. Telling them everything about me and they listen attentively. Maybe making friends isn’t that hard.
I realize the more I talk, they’re looking at my bag and belongings. I don’t comment on it, maybe they just like them. Stacey grabs my notebook, flipping through the pages as her blonde pigtails sway.
They invite me to sit with them and I can’t help the joy I’m feeling, my parents would love to hear more about my new girl friends.
After our class, they walk out and I quickly grab my bag, following them. They’re walking beside each other ahead of me, talking, and I’m in the back. They don’t make way for me, it's okay, maybe there is no space for me.
I bump into them as they stop abruptly. “I need to fix my hair in the restroom.”
“Donna, we need to grab our things from the lockers.” Stacey rolls her eyes.
Donna seems upset that no one will accompany her.
“I will go with you.”
The girls look at me then at each other as Donna smiles “really? Okay, come on.” She grabs my hand and leads us away from the others.
