And I will bedamnedif I let this world end our story this way.
Fixing my round glasses that I have kept since Elsie chose them for me, calculations and drafts fill every surface.
Hunching over my dark oak desk, my head hangs low between my shoulder blades as I take deep breath—grounding myself.
Fingers tapping obsessively as numbers and scraps over papers rush through my vision, voices murmuring around me as my eyes twitch.
“Shut up!” My outburst meets the air as I look around me to the empty space. Schizophrenia is a curse that makes you believe you’re surrounded and loved, letting you live in the fantasy of being chosen without conditions. Until the last moment you let yourself fall into the trap, the voices become louder.
Maddening.
Until they all stop and you realize that it’s all been a lie.
I have always been alone.
Once the voices quiet down, I walk towards the glass huge tanks at the end wall. I tilt my head to the side expecting the work closely and how far I have come. Green hue light casts overthe floors as I put my hands in my pocket. The corpses float individually through the liquids in both containers.
To conceal a dead body, I added fluids that contain concentrated 37% of formaldehyde with methanol, sodium borate, sodium nitrate and glycerin. I have perfected the solution over the years and the bodies are as good as new. Just motionless.
Their eyes that were once full of spark, dimmed now with an empty soul. But, they are a treasured possession to succeed.
I follow the tubes that swirl to the other side of the basement, bubbles rush through them to the final tank. A human figure floats in a blur as I raise my hand gently and run it down the glass. “Please, work this time. I can’t wait much longer.” I pleaded quietly.
This is attempt number four hundred twenty one.
All the failed attempts were getting better by the time, some of them didn’t even grow to a full body and I had to either dissolve or bury them.
The amount of almost fully grown bodies I had to carry outside as they lay limp in my arms. I couldn’t handle looking closely at the close features of Elsie. But, the wait will be worth it.
I feel it in every fiber of my being that I’m getting closer to what I desire most.
Stepping away from the tank as I face away, my coat lays down on the floor as I fix my dress shirt cuffs. The room temperature seems to rise as I look up to the small digital screen. The temperature is rising quickly, I walk towards the cables and tubes around the basement, inspecting.
Nothing seems out of place. It’s getting hotter as sweat leaks down my forehead over my furrowed brows. Unbuttoning my shirt a bit as my breathing quickens.
Beep.
Beep.
Loud alarming sounds bust my ears as my head snaps back over my shoulders. The screen under the tank is glitching with a bold red text flickering. I can’t seem to read it, striding towards it as the tubes start to vibrate aggressively.
Mission processing.
The screen reads as my eyes widen. I look up at the body, her fingers are twitching and my heart drops.
It’s working.
The bleeping sound keeps getting louder and every tube looks like it will bust out. I press my palms onto the tank and take in her features, her shut eyes are twitching indicating that she’s distressed or worse in pain. I slam my fist over the screen.
“Stop!” I scream over the rattling sounds. “stop hurting her!” Slamming my fist repeatedly as the glass shatters and slices through my skin. The screen kept flickering and before I could punch it again.
The tank explodes.
Glass shatters and shoots everywhere as my body is thrown back from the impact, my back hits a table breaking it down. Instinctively,I raise my hands to protect my eyes. My ears ring as I slowly look around me. Most of my solutions are spilled all over the counters and ground, some parts are dissolved from the intense chemicals. Glass shards are sparking every surface as my eyes follow each one of them to the shattered tank. Green liquid spills out to the ground in a waterfall as my eyes land on the human laying face down on the ground, short white hair covering her face, her body glistening. I stay still, not daring to even breathe. This is the first time ever the tank explodes, is she dead?
Her fingers move and that’s enough answer I get. She raises her arms and flays her legs, bending them and trying to stand up. I watch in awe as she rests on her knees and looks at me. Her ice blue eyes stared at me in astonishment and fear. She takesin every feature of my face and slowly her gaze falls down to my body then hers. She raises her hands up to her face, turning her palms on each side. I can see that her nerves are shaking as she looks back at me, her mouth moving silently as her legs give out.
I throw myself towards her, catching her fall as I embrace her in my arms, my own body shaking. I think my brain is still in shock, processing that Elsie is alive, here, in my arms after so long.
