Meg has tried reaching out, but I’m too pissed to reply to her messages, and still a bit freaked out. She can play at witchcraft on her own. Though part of me wishes I could tell her about Paul.
We’ve seen each other a lot since that kiss. It’s kind of amazing and kind of scary. I can’t get him out of my head. We’re spending so much time together, talking and…doing other things. Like, he seems to want to be with me.
As a secret.
But he’s new to this and he deserves time. Plus, I’m having fun, and even if I’m obsessing a bit, it’s helping distract me from the visions.
Which are everywhere.
I see flashes of light on the streets, shining out of houses as we drive through the city. Entire wards in the hospital flare up as I walk the corridors. I ignore them all: the lights, the whispering voices from radios, the crows that surround our home and tap on the bedroom window as I lie in bed.
My head throbs constantly.
I’m exhausted from sleepless nights punctuated by dreams of screaming women, dead babies and bloodied limbs.
‘You OK?’ Paul is lying beside me on his bed. His top is off and he’s running a finger through the dark hair on his chest.
‘Sort of.’
He smiles. A kind smile. He pulls me towards him
I move away. ‘I should get back for dinner.’
‘No, stay with me.’
‘OK, but just for ten minutes.’
A growl of victory from Paul and he pulls me close. I sigh into his arms.
I’ve seen him every day since ‘movie night’. If I’m not at the hospital or home, I’m here. We hang out alone mostly, but if we’re with Cormac we have hurried kisses when he’s not in the room. It’s stupid and exciting. And while part of me knows it’s a huge mistake and can only end in a bad way, I don’t care. When we’re together I feel like…Well, I feel something other than sad and frightened.
‘When are your parents back?’ I ask as I come up for air.
‘Three days. Plenty of time for fun.’ He grins and I kiss him.
A slicing headache signals a vision and I’m aware of a change of light outside, but I refuse to acknowledge it. I must be frowning. Paul strokes my cheek. ‘What’s up?’
‘Nothing.’
We kiss again. The headache intensifies and I close my eyes as the light spills into Paul’s bedroom. I try to lose myself in his arms and the heat of him, but the pain is too much. I pull away, swearing under my breath.
‘Did I do something?’ Paul sits up on his bed.
My head is throbbing as I pick up my things. ‘No. I should get home.’
He shrugs. ‘No worries.’
‘See you later?’
‘Sure, maybe. Might have plans though.’
My stomach knots. I stop tying my laces. ‘Oh?’
‘Yeah.’
I want so badly not to care, but the headache is like a needle in the back of my head. ‘Who with?’ He says nothing and opens a message on his phone. The light outside pulses. ‘Is it Ellen?’
‘It’s Ellen.’
