Lying still, I watched him enter dreams, stroking his back, hoping it would keep any nightmares away. “You’re safe, angel. You’re safe,” I whispered, mostly because I needed to hear it.
With the quiet came the ambush. Everything I’d been holding at bay to stay strong for him, every image, every helpless second came roaring back. Vincent’s hands on him. Oliver struggling against him, that bruise I couldn’t protect him from. And underneath it all, the memory that rewrote me, my sister’s lifeless, beaten face the last time I saw her.
The damn inside me broke. Tears came fast, unrelenting, trails streaking down my face, catching in the corners of my mouth, making my nose stuffy. My chest did that uncontrollable heaving thing it does when emotion bursts out of you.
Oliver stirred. “Luke?” My name came out groggy and sluggish.
“It’s fine, angel, go back to sleep. I’m sorry I woke you,” I managed to get out, but a tremulous audible hiccup of distress left me.
Sleep fled from his features in an instant. “What is it? Are you alright?”
I sniffed. “Fine. Just a minor leak. Seems my face came with a faulty gasket. I’ll have it all fixed by tomorrow at the latest, replaced with the deluxe no-drip version.”
“I happen to be very fond of the version in front of me,” Oliver said, pressing a kiss to my mouth. “I think perhaps we can fix it together without needing to cash in on a replacement if you tell me what rattled the machinery.”
“You know, the usual suspects. Fear showing off. Memory doing a director’s cut. I heard Vincent was at your group and my brain went full disaster cinema. I thought I might lose you. I thought you were going to be taken away from me. And I couldn’t...” My voice broke.
Oliver’s hand cupped my face as he kissed me again. “Shh, it’s okay now, honey. I’m here, I’m safe.”
“I’m sorry, I don’t want to make this about me after what you went through.”
“Uh-uh. You’re not doing that. I’m not letting you guilt-trip yourself for having emotions about something traumatic. Crumple that thought up and toss it in the trash where it belongs. We can both be hurt by the same thing and still help each other through it. You didn’t hide from me when I fell apart.I’m not letting you hide from me now. Let me be here for you too.”
Taking my head, he pulled it to his chest, positioning it directly over the steady thud of his heartbeat. “Hear that? My heart beats on, and right now it’s beating for you.”
His mouth fit to mine, moving slowly and sweetly, steady and lingering. Our lips parted just enough for a shared inhale, his breath fanning across my cheek. “Feel that? My warmth, my breath, the way I’m holding you? I’m here beside you. I’m safe and I’m not going anywhere.” Another kiss. “Look at me,” he whispered, tilting my chin until our eyes met. “See. I’m right here. You didn’t lose me.”
His mouth met mine again, fuller this time, a promise pressed to my lips. A vow of mornings we hadn’t lived yet and a future we’d build brick by steady brick, side by side. In that kiss lived every tomorrow life would grant us.
Epilogue
Oliver
Two weeks had passed since Vincent’s arrest. His firm suspended him pending an internal review that looked poised to end in termination. Formal complaints had been sent to the state bar—one from me, one from Luke’s firm, and one from the DV outreach committee. Disbarment wasn’t guaranteed, but it now hovered in the realm of possibility.
Either way, I didn’t care to spend another ounce of energy on him. Whatever consequences he’d face it was his own bed he would be lying in. I no longer lived in the world he ruled with fear. I slept beside Luke now. He was where my life was headed, toward a future we would build, not one I would merely survive.
And that’s what the past two weeks had become: building a future.
The first few days after everything went down, Luke went full support system. I’m talking if koalas needed emotional support animals he could’ve applied and been hired on the spot. If I sat, he sat with at least three points of physical contact. If I shifted, his arm tightened. If I moved three feet across the room, he followed like I was an industrial-strength magnet and he was made of iron. Though I teased him about it, I loved every second of it. I also knew he needed it.
While I’d lived my own personal hell when Vincent walked into that room, Luke had been thrown headfirst into his own.It had unearthed the nightmare of losing Carrie and the terror and helplessness of watching someone he loved be hurt again. If becoming my shadow for a few days helped him recalibrate, I would give him that comfort a thousand times over.
Once we had both found our footing again, Luke returned to work and I met up with Talia. When I told her everything, she gasped so loudly the barista spilled the drink they were making.
“Why that stinky little weasel! I can’t believe I thanked him for his services. I wish I could go back in time and deliver a well-timed, completely accidental elephant stomp on his Louboutins. No wonder you were acting so weird. I’m so sorry, Oliver. That must have been awful.”
I also spoke with Elijah about how I could get involved in the DV community. He told me that many domestic-violence shelters and treatment centers were always looking for volunteers. I didn’t envision making it my full-time career the way Luke did, but I wanted to help protect others from the kind of harm I’d survived. Having someone who knew the system and knew how to help had changed everything for me. I wanted to be that resource for someone else. I’d reviewed the available roles and began training as a crisis-line volunteer.
Tonight had been my first in-person training session after completing the online modules. I left with my brain buzzing and my heart tender. It had been a lot, but in a rewarding way.
When I walked through our front door, still carrying that strange mix of exhaustion and quiet triumph, Luke met me at the door, wrapping me in a warm hug as he kissed me. “Hi, angel. How did it go?”
“It was good. Intensive but good.”
“Come, relax, tell me all about it,” he said, leading me to the couch.
I told him about the exercises, the role-playing, how overwhelming and meaningful and eye-opening it all felt. Iexplained how the next five weeks would look—workshops, supervised practice calls, shadowing experienced advocates before eventually taking my first call on my own.
