Page 8 of Midlife in Hell


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“The Queen of Hell can’t be seen riding with anincubus.”

I didn’t like that. He said ‘incubus’ like it was dirty. I flipped him off, and he gasped. Nero had done nothing but set me at ease and call Kujo out when he was being a dick. I didn’t like that at all.

I marched over and slid my hand into Nero’s.

“Nero will be taking me on the back of his motorcycle.”

The green demon looked like he was going to die of shame and that seemed like a personal problem because it was going to bemeon the motorcycle and I didn’t care.

“You probably don’t want to be seen with me,” Nero murmured. “We aren’t prudes here, but they still look down on my kind, even if they enjoy using us.”

“Well,Ilike you because you were kind to me and looking down on people because of their DNA is fucking racist. I don’t give a shit about any of that. I’ve never been on a motorcycle before and I want to be on the back of yours.”

“Might want to hop on the back of mine if you want a motorcycle ride,” Celix said. “Nero drives like a fucking maniac.”

“I think she’s into that,” Kujo grumped.

I flipped him off, too, because he wasn’t close enough to assault his nuts again. Nero just grinned. He grabbed the second helmet off his bike and handed it to me.

“I’ll be careful since I’m carrying precious cargo.”

Dudes, he was not careful in the slightest. He peeled off like a Bat Out of Hell and just continued to drive that way. It wasexhilarating.I wrapped my arms around Nero tighter and threw my head back to howl. Yeah, I didn’t care what anyone thought. I was doing this again. I felt Nero chuckle and if anything, he drove faster.

He took a curve like we were being chased and then came to a screeching halt in front of an honest to Betsy castle. Seven demons were waiting. They looked human, so I was guessing these were the princes. They were definitely looking down their noses at me except for one, who looked amused.

I hopped off the back of the bike and handed Nero the helmet.

“Cool beans. I’m so doing that again.”

“She’sobviouslynot Lucifer’s daughter.”

“Lucifer would never.”

“Why did you even bring her here?”

The one who looked amused snorted.

“First of all, she looks just like him. Secondly, Lucifer completelywould.”

“Why don’t you go take a nap, Abaddon?”

So,thatwas Abaddon. All the princes looked different, but they were perfect specimens of men if they didn’t open their mouths. Except Abaddon who looked like he was about to take a nap, but found all of this hilarious.

“Because, you arseholes want to take over Hell and I have a feeling, this one isn’t going to let you. Right, little one?”

I usually would have gotten furious at that nick name, but it didn’t bother me coming from him. Wait. Weren’t these Lucifer’sbrothers? Gross. I wasn’t going to marry any of them so they could plonk their butts on the throne. I gave Abaddon finger guns because he was right. I wasn’t going to stop them if I wasn’t Lucifer’s kid, but several people seemed to think I was.

“Come inside then. The riffraff can stay out.”

“No,” I said. “If I’m a queen, then I’m going to need bodyguards. I want these three as my guards. And Wrathhog if you can get her.”

One of them grinned at me.

“That’s my kid. A child of Satan is a child of Wrath. Are you sure you can handle her?”

“From what I’ve heard, we’ll probably be besties.”

Kujo snorted and Satan started laughing. Yeah, I’d just met Satan. He looked like a fucking super model, but with giant horns. His skin wasn’t red, so someone lied about that.