“If I’m using Hell resources, can we even find information on volcanos in the mortal realm?”
“Baby, this is Hell. You can find information about volcanos in any realm.”
“If shit ever settles down, I want to know about all the other worlds out there. You do realize that if an imp was left to feed him, then whoever captured Lucifer is from Hell, not Heaven, right? Asmodeus is a dick and the rest of them just go along with it. My money is on him.”
Celix started playing with my hair and ifIcould purr, I would have.
“Asmodeus is more of a plotter than a fighter. He never would have gotten the drop on Lucifer. It could beallof them.”
“Except Satan and Abaddon.”
“No. Satan would kill them. No one knows if this is true or just an urban legend, but I heard Abaddon was a beast during their rebellion. When they got banished, he decided he was never doing that again and was just going to make the best of it.”
“Really? He was giving ‘fun uncle’ vibes. My mom was an only child, so I didn’t have one, but I imagine he would have had Super Mario Brothers on Nintendo, Mountain Dew instead of Tab, and an endless supply of pudding pops.”
“Um, I’m not an incubus, so I wouldn’t know the first thing about what happens in Abaddon’s house, but Felid demons tend to have litters, so I have a ton of fun uncles and aunts.”
“It was me and Mom against the world and I have no regrets, but I wish she had family for support because I wasn’t easy sometimes.”
“If you want to experience a big family, you can come to my baby siblings’ birthday party. There are three of them and it’s utter chaos.”
“Yeah, but ages are weird here. You could mean a twenty-five-year-old or an actual toddler.”
“They are sixteen. My parents got a bit of empty nest syndrome after my litter moved out and had another. My sister is currently in her boy-crazy phase and her littermates are terrorizing her boyfriends. Some ofmylittermates are givingthem tips, but my sister and I are helping my baby sister get her revenge.”
“I wanna help your baby sister get revenge because she’s allowed to be boy crazy at that age as long as she’s smart about it. How many siblings do you have, anyway?”
“There were four in my litter and three in the one that came after, so there are seven of us. My mom has eight siblings and my dad has nine, so there are a lot of aunts and uncles. Our gatherings can get a little…rowdy. Jenath, my baby sister, decided Kujo was her soulmate last year. It’s funny watching him squirm.”
“Wait, Jenath actually knows Kujo and likes him like that? Yeah, he’s super hot, but has she heard him open his mouth?”
“Kujo is boneheaded, but eventually, he’ll realize it was his own damned fault he got shampoo in the eye and a foot to the nuts. He may or may not apologize in anything more than a grunt, but he’ll stop being dickish. He’s actually an amazing friend when he wants to be. Loyal as fuck.”
“Still rude. I prefer you and Nero. What does your mom think about your sixteen-year-old sister having a crush on your coworker?”
“Oh, she thinks it’s hilarious. Kujo’s mom sucks, so my mom adopted him. He likes my family, and he’s scared if he does anything, they’ll kick him to the curb like his birth family did. Plus, Jenath is just a kid with a crush on an older demon. He’s not going to crush her, by being mean about it, but she’s pushing boundaries. She keeps blaming Nero and saying he’s pushing lust vibes out to get away with it, but Nero is one of the strongest Incubi in Hell and has exceptional control. He’s also really big on consent, so no one will ever feel that from him unless they’ve given him permission.”
“Oh, he’s pretty fucking potent once he’s switched on,” I said, fanning myself at the memories.
“I told you about my family. Tell me more about your mom. She sounds like a strong woman.”
“She was. Cancer took her too soon. We weren’t rich, but I didn’t want for anything. If anyone ever told me I couldn’t do something and I came home upset about it, she told me to do it anyway out of spite.”
“Nero and I never would have gathered that about you. Our moms raised us to not rock the boat because it would get us arrested. Kujo was always the one who was going to realize that about you.”
“Hungry?” Nero said, coming in with a tray.
Yeah, I was. I was probably hungrier that I’d ever been since I landed in Hell. Nero basically made grownup Lunchables. I refused to call it a charcuterie board because I wasn’t fucking fancy. There was also some kind of cookie there and I had to ask if it was chocolate chip or raisin because this was Hell, these were demons, and that was just one of the reasons I had trust issues.
“It’s my mom’s recipe,” Nero beamed. “It’s chocolate, but there’s magic in there to soothe when you’re stressed and it helps during demon puberty. She taught us the recipe for when we eventually have kids. Mom will lose her shit I baked them for Lucifer’s daughter.”
“Well,I’mlosing my shit you baked magic cookies for me from scratch and didn’t use premade dough. Holy shit, dude, even I buy the premade shit when I want cookies. Can I keep you?”
“I invited her to Jenath’s birthday party.”
“Are you trying to scare her off?”
I moaned when I tried one of the cookies because yeah, it tasted amazing, but I also relaxed a little because of the magic. I didn’t know what it was doing to my magic since I hadn’tfelt it much since I blew the roof off my house. Nero and Celix instantly zeroed in on me.
