“It was stupid to bet money on things I said in my sleep.”
“Four hundred dominions, asshole.”
“Who has four hundred dominions?” Wrathhog said, joining us in the kitchen.
“We’re pretty sure Kujo is going to be a seer, but he doesn’t believe us because he’s Cambion.”
“It’s rare, but humans have been seers, too. The real ones just got drowned out by the charlatans. It skips generations, but Kujo could very well be a seer even if he’s Cambion.”
I stuck my tongue out at Kujo and flipped him off for good measure because I was a mature woman and he wasn’t even trying to be open about this in a world full of magic.
“Fuck me,” Kujo muttered. “I keep dreaming I’m stuck in a cage in some kind of volcano while an imp keeps pelting me with fruit because that’s all I’m being fed. And the imp has his dick out because he’s an imp. It probably doesn’t mean anything.”
“Shit, is there writing on the cage?” Wrathhog asked.
“Yeah, and it’s kind of glowing blue, but I can’t read it. I know a lot of languages, but I think it’s gibberish.”
“It’s Enochian. I’m pretty sure you just found Lucifer,” Wrathhog said.
Everyone knew Kujo was going to end up a seer. Kujo probably knew he was going to be a seer, but was fighting it because of what it would mean. He couldn’t deny it now. Kujo was probably going to be a powerful seer if he half-assed located Lucifer this early on.
“I can’t see who is in the cage. I’m seeing through their eyes. It could be any asshole,” Kujo argued.
“Not in that cage. My dad told me about them. It’s the only thing that can hold an angel. They have to add extra warding if they are holding an archangel. It’s overkill for any other being. They used them in the war, but angels don’t really do prisoners. They got the information they needed on the rebellion and then killed them. They aren’t a forgiving bunch for a lot that preachesthat. The only reason they’d have to keep an angel in a cage inthiscentury is because theycan’tkill them.”
“Yeah, but most realms have volcanoes.IfI’m a seer and I found Lucifer, I couldn’t tell you where the fucking volcano is,” Kujo grumped.
“Oh, you’re a seer. And a very powerful one. The cage should be subduing Lucifer, but also preventing anyone from finding him by any means. You should keep this at a need-to-know basis,” Wrathhog said.
“You did get one big hint,” Sydney said. “I’m not sure what therestof an imp looks like since you just defaced Lucifer’s portrait with their dicks, but I’m guessing there aren’t many places an imp could gather fruit to pelt someone with.”
“You did what now with Lucifer’s portrait?” Wrathhog laughed.
“It was judging me,” Kujo grunted.
Whatever that meant, but Sydney was right. Imps couldn’t pass in other realms. They looked like really buff toddlers with some kind of skin disease. Our glamours could do a lot, but it couldn’t make us bigger than we were. Imps never went to the mortal realm because they’d only ever look like toddlers and they didn’t have the temperament to fake it. They’d probably go feral and bite a finger off if someone said they were cute.
“We know Lucifer isn’t in Hell because the gates are weakening,” Nero said.
“Theyhaveto be in the mortal realm,” I said. “The rest of them don’t like outsiders and don’t play well with others. They wouldn’t work with anyone to stash the King of Hell there. They also have magic, so if they came across an imp picking fruit, they’d know it wasn’t a toddler. Most people are stronger than an imp in a fight when they know what they are dealing with.”
“So, we need to find a volcano somewhere mangoes and pineapple grow that’s remote enough that most people wouldn’tnotice a demon picking them,” Sydney said. “Good job, baby girl.”
“I hate you.”
“Right, so Kujo, go hit things with Wrathhog. Nero, you’re on snacks. I’ll be doing research. Sydney, where do you want to be?” I asked.
We all had different strengths. Sydney seemed to slide right in with us, even if she and Kujo were butting heads, but I hadn’t known her well enough to give her an assignment. I saw her books, so she might want to do a deep dive on volcanos.
She also might really want to wail on Kujo again and I wasn’t going to stop her because he was being a dick. She was eyeing Kujo like that was where her mind was going.
“I do like sparring, but I also like research and we need to find Lucifer. It’s a date, Celix.”
Oh, no. When I took her out on a date, it was going to be special, even if it had to be contained to this house because it wasn’t safe to go out.
You basically had to do lots of deep dives, even when you were writing romance, and there were bizarre facts about literally anything and everything. I was betting whatever volcano Lucifer was being stashed in used to regularly have virgins tossed in it so appease a god of frogs or something because it wasthatkind of fucked-up situation.
We invaded Lucifer’s study with my laptop and Celix’s and snuggled into the sofa.
