“No, Mom, I’ve been a little busy adjusting to everything.” Great, now I sound like a temperamental teenager.
“Isn’t that what Dr. Wilkes is there for? I mean, I'm always happy to talk to you, but I can’t really relate. I grew up and married in Moraine; I've never had a big move. I was born here and I'll probablydie here. All this to say, I think it would be a good idea for you to make an appointment with her.”
If I don’t acquiesce, she’ll keep prodding. “I will after this week.”
“I think you should do it sooner.”
Give me an ever-loving break.“Mom, I am thirty years old, and I think I’m fairly self-aware. I know when I need extra help.”
“I know you are, sweetie. I just want to make sure you’re taking care of yourself.” I know she means well.
“Can we change the subject?”Please?!
“Of course. How’s Skye?” She knows what she’s doing. This woman helps combat my anxiety by reminding me that I’m not alone here in Grand River.
“She’s good, she got a job at a coffee shop nearby.”
“Oh good! Have you two made any friends?”
“Haven’t really had the time. Last weekend Skye went home to see Tori and I’m pretty sure she’s going back again tomorrow after work.”
“Really, what for?” Good question. I’ve been so caught up in my own head I didn’t think to ask.
“No clue. It’s Skye and Tori — who knows what those two are up to. I think Skye mentioned a project or something a few days ago?”
“I haven’t seen Tori since you left.” Tori’s always had her own life separate from Skye and me. That tends to happen when you meet the love of your life at sixteen and get married at twenty.
I chuckle and say, “Why would you if I’m not there?”
“I would've seen her at church the last two Sundays, but now that I think about it, I haven't seen her at church in a month. She and Chase are always there!”
Not sure how to respond to her frustration, I don’t. If Tori is anything, she’s a creature of habit. Missing a month’s worth of Sundays at churchisout of character. Mom doesn’t seem to pause for my response before she barrels on.
“You don’t know what this mystery project is?”
“Nope. Not a clue. Honestly, Mom, I only half remember the conversation. I’m pretty sure Skye was talking about ten things atonce so she could have been referring to a project at the coffee shop for all I know.”
Suddenly, as if she’s come to a revelation, mom gasps. “Maybe Tori wants to open her own accounting firm! God knows she’s been working for Roger for way too long, getting paid pennies no doubt.”
I don’t make a habit of prying into other people’s business, but Mom is a meddler, albeit with good intentions.
Sunny knocks on the door and peaks in. “Monty?”
I smile at my sweet girl and pat the bed next to me. She climbs up and snuggles into me. “I’m on the phone with Grandma, want to talk to her?”
Sunny jumps up excitedly. “Ooooooh, Grandma!” So much for snuggling.
I say my goodbyes to Mom and hand over the phone to Sunny. Those two will gab at each other for God only knows how long, so I leave her on my bed and decide to take a shower before going to sleep.
The hot water beating down on my head, neck, and shoulders helps to relieve the headache I’ve been battling most of today. After washing I close my eyes and rest my forehead against the shower wall, relishing the feel of the water on my back.
Belle, what was I thinking moving so far away from home?! I’ve never had to worry if Sunny was happy, who her friends were, where she disappeared to outside, how she was faring in school. Sure, she seems fine, but what if she’s not telling me everything? What if she hates it here but is afraid to tell me the truth? What if she’s bullied at school and the teacher doesn’t tell me? It’s not like back home where most of the teachers and administrators knew our family. I feel like I’m wandering around, blind, with no one to guide me in the right direction.
What am I supposed to do about Dexter? Why can’t I stop thinking about his smile, his kiss, his … everything. I AM NOT THIS PERSON. I don’t swoon or pine after men. Especially not when I’m overwhelmed by everything happening around me.
“Hey, here’s an idea. How about we move Alis across the state to a new city, new school, new everything, and then, right when she’s most excited andconfident about her choices, we’ll kick her feet out from under her with … wait for it … A MAN!”
I can see the you up there, sitting on a cloud couch, having a good laugh at my expense.
