Lex keeps talking, but I’m already annoyed and want to get off the phone.
“Fine. I’ll be there in thirty. I have to put some makeup on, so I don’t look like my heart was ripped out and stomped on. See you then.”
I hang up.
By the time I make it downstairs, Hayes is on the couch. It’s his day off, which means he’s lounging. Leighton’s at work. The kids are at school. The house is quiet in a way it never is when everyone’s home.
He pops a piece of popcorn into his mouth. “Where you going?”
“To meet Lex to film a podcast segment,” I say with a sigh. “Then my appointment. I find out today whether you’re going to be an uncle to a niece or a nephew.”
I do a small dance, trying to mask the fact I’m missing a very big piece today. A six-three pitcher to be precise.
Hayes smiles, but it comes off as pitying. “Can’t wait.”
I say goodbye, then get in my Uber, which drops me at Lex’s building. She’s already outside, bouncing on her toes.
“You’re acting weird,” I tell her as I get out of the car. “Where is this magical guest?”
“They’re ready to go.” She grins. “I already got them mic’d up.”
“Well, I’d like to talk to them for a minute before we start recording.” I follow her toward the sidewalk. “I need to know what I’m walking into. Tell them what to expect.”
“You’re late.” She reaches for my shirt to clip on my mic.
I smack her hand. “Lex. Dinner first, remember?”
“Okay. Real talk. I know you’ve been in your head lately. I’m just trying to help. So just… don’t bite me.”
I fake a smile.
“Better.” She literally presses her fingers into my cheeks to push my smile higher.
I groan.
She laughs. “I’ll be right back.”
“Okay.” I stand alone on the sidewalk while traffic hums by and my brain does what it does best.
Spiral.
Because it’s impossible not to think about Foster.
I hate myself for missing him.
He’s acting as if he doesn’t give a shit about me, so why should I care?
Why did I even text him about the appointment?
Because I want him at the scan. Because I want him there when they say boy or girl and my whole life shifts again. Because I’m mad and I still want him anyway, which is the most humiliating part of it all.
“All right,” Lex says, popping back into view as though she’s on a game show. “Here we go. Your fifth guest…”
I turn around.
And my entire body goes cold.
“What is this?” I whisper, because my throat is suddenly too tight to breathe.
