“And I’ll expense some hand warmers.”
“Thank you, I’d appreciate warm hands feeling me up next time.”
We both laugh, and she goes back to pick up her camera. We leave my apartment, but as we’re about to go down the stairs, Jerry’s walking up.
“Well, hello, Slummy, how are you this morning?” Lex says.
I knock her with my hand.
“Funny.” He narrows his eyes at Lex. “I was just going up to look at your garbage disposal.”
I stop in the stairwell. Jerry is a good landlord. He always fixes things when I need him to, and he didn’t raise my rent last year. But I’m not sure if it’s his swollen belly that hangs over his pants or the fact he wears white T-shirts with matching velvet jogging suits, but Lex isn’t completely off base when she calls him Slummy. Although I think it’s mostly because he tried to hit on her once and had a hard time accepting the answer no.
“Oh, nothing is wrong with my garbage disposal.”
He glances at Lex and back at me. “Huh, maybe I had the wrong apartment.”
“Do better, Jerry. You only have six to remember.” Lex walks down the steps. “Come on, I don’t have all day.”
“See you, Jerry.” I leave him at the top of the stairs and follow Lex.
“Don’t forget to talk to your brother about those tickets,” Jerry says. “You know my property taxes are going up this year, and I’d hate to raise rent here.”
I sigh, and Lex gives me a look as if to say, what the hell, he’s blackmailing you?
I raise my hand, not turning around. “On it.”
“Get on it faster.” He laughs.
Lex’s face transforms as if she’s going to throw up.
We push through the vestibule and onto the sidewalk.
“He’s so creepy.” She does a full-body shudder.
“He’s just lonely.”
“There’s something about him,” she mumbles, setting up her camera as we walk toward the corner.
I need to find someone who looks interesting and might spare some time to talk with me. We walk down the street as I search for someone who looks as though they’ll give us good content.
I spot a mom with a kid in a stroller, one strapped to her chest, and a fresh iced coffee drink in the cup holder.
“Let’s try her.” I walk toward the woman as Lex sighs behind me.
We usually shy away from the moms. They’re generally doing too much multitasking with too many distractions for us to have a good conversation.
“Excuse me, my name is Callie, and I have a podcast?—”
Her eyes widen. “I know who you are.” She stops and glances to my right. “Lex!” She acts as if they’re long-lost best friends. “Oh my god. I can’t believe this is happening to me. Just wait until everyone hears at pickup later.”
Lex shoots me a look like told you it was a bad idea.
“So, is that a yes? May I join you wherever you’re going so that we can have a conversation for the podcast?”
She lets go of the stroller, and it starts to roll away, but she grabs it quickly. “Oh that would’ve been bad.” She sticks out her hand, and I take it. “My name is Amelia. Nice to meet you.”
We move to the edge of the sidewalk, and she puts the baby in the second section of the stroller. It didn’t look that hard. The baby is sleeping, and my stomach tugs at how adorable he is.
